A Jewish Thought

Is Rosh Hashanah Really Rosh Hashanah?

2008-10-24T12:43:00.000-07:00

Yesterday I wrote about Yom Kippur so today, naturally, I am going to talk about Rosh Hashanah. What fun is it to go in order. The more I celebrate this holiday, the more of an anomaly I find it. First of all, the holiday combines the theme of repentance, of starting the ten days of awe, or asking and praying for forgiveness, with the joyous aspect of celebrating the new year, of trying to get the year off on the correct foot. That dichotomy has always fascinated me.

A second aspect that I find interesting has to do with the fact that biblically, we do not celebrate Rosh Hashanah. Before you think I am not aware of the biblical reference, hold your comment. Certainly there is a reference to this holiday in the Torah. The Torah, however, references the first day of the seventh month. According to the Torah, Nissan (the month of Passover) is the first month. I am aware of all the different commentaries that explain how Tishrei (the month when we celebrate Rosh Hashanah) is really the first month, but the Torah never refers to it that way.

In addition, the Torah never refers to this day as the “New Year”, as Rosh Hashanah. The day is referred to as “Yom Hadin” (Judgment Day), Yom Hazikaron (The Day of Remembrance) and Yom Teruach (Loosely translated as the Day of Blowing the Shofar, since the Teruach is one of the notes blown on the shofar). Never is this day called the New Year.

It is fascinating how different customs, practices and beliefs come into being. Of course this is an important day and has significance. Still, there appear to have been some changes of the centuries that have been made to this holiday. It is just interesting to consider how things came to be.

Intense Versus Sad

2008-10-23T18:57:00.001-07:00

Now that the Jewish Holidays are over, hopefully life can return to normal. I enjoy the Holidays but it is a bit much. I do have some reflections on the different holidays that I will be posting over the next few days (or weeks). Today I will start with Yom Kippur.

It is amazing to me how many people misunderstand the significance of this day. I was planning a lesson for Hebrew School and was looking at some YouTube videos. I look at the discussion that surrounded one of the videos about Yom Kippur. The comments were indicating that this was the saddest day on the Jewish Calendar.

Yom Kippur is intense, it is serious and it is important, but it is not a sad day. Judaism does have such a day, that day being Tisha B’Av. Yom Kippur, however, actually has a positive tone. The idea of Yom Kippur is purification, asking G-d for forgiveness so we can start the year with a clean slate. It is like the student who begins fresh at a new school. Instead of having the baggage follow you, you begin anew. That, certainly, is not a sad day.

It is true we deprive ourselves on this day in a number of ways. We are even told to afflict our souls. Still, a shehechayanu is made on this day (and it is only made on joyous occasions. We are told that we will be forgiven. So, I certainly disagree with the idea that Yom Kippur is the saddest day of the Jewish year, or even just a sad day.

You Can Come To Israel... But Don't Bring The Family

2008-08-29T13:24:00.001-07:00

My sister, her husband and their family recently returned from Israel. Their oldest son was studying in Israel for the year and wanted to stay another year. Arrangements were being made and what I recently found out was, the yeshiva where my nephew was studying was putting pressure on him telling him according to halachah (Jewish Law), he was not allowed to return to the States. With finances being an issue, the Yeshiva was willing to help with financial aid.

The fact that my sister and the whole family went to Israel complicates this. This is the first time they have been to Israel as a family although both my sister and brother-in-law were there over 20 years ago. Due to the settling of my father’s estate, they were all able to go and my youngest nephew got an aliyah at the Kotel in honor of his Bar Mitzvah.

While traveling the Holy Land, my sister and brother-in-law received a call that the head of my nephew’s yeshiva wanted to talk with them and it was important. Apparently it is policy, as best my sister could determine, that they do not offer any financial aid to people if their family comes to Israel. I guess the thinking is, if they can afford a trip, they can afford the ridiculously expensive tuition of such institutions.

When my brother-in-law got in touch with the head of the yeshiva, they basically told him that if he interrupted, they would simply end the conversation. After listening to them go on for awhile, telling him that they no longer would accept my nephew because they were in Israel, my brother-in-law said, “But,”.

I assume the next step was to tell them how my father had recently passed away, it was the first trip they had taken since they were married, etc. He never got a chance to say any of it. As soon as he said, “But,” the person on the other end of the phone, the head of the yeshiva, hung up.

Personally, I think this is ridiculous and unscrupulous. First, trying to convince him that according to Jewish law he needed to stay, I think is unethical. Beyond that, instead of being willing to engage in a dialogue and hear what others have to say, the approach is to hang up, that they can have their say but no one else is allowed.

I think it is unfortunate that my nephew is caught in the middle and he is trying to find a way he can get back there. Personally, I think the yeshiva should be told exactly what they can do with it. By the way, my sister agrees but respects the wishes of her son and will allow him (as if she really has a choice) to try and find another way to pay for the schooling.

Learning An Aliyah

2008-08-20T13:31:00.000-07:00

Have you ever wondered what ever possessed you to do something? In one more week I begin classes yet I have inquired about reading Torah in Mid-September. Unlike some people who are very talented, it takes me a number of weeks to prepare. As a result, right as the semester starts hitting the busy season, shortly before I will be taking time off for the Jewish Holidays, I will be busy preparing an aliyah.

Fortunately I was smart enough to only “Volunteer” to read one aliyah, and fortunately, it is not that long. Yes, it will take some preparation but it could be much worse.

So why is it that I am looking to chant this aliyah? Well, my Mom’s yahrzeit is coming up and I have always tried to mark the anniversary of her passing on the Jewish calendar by chanting at least one aliyah. She had the opportunity to hear my chant a few Haftorot but, other than my Bar Mitzvah, I don’t think she ever heard me chant Torah. Certainly she always knew and, more importantly, believed, I could do it but I never did. Now, as a way to honor her memory, I try to follow the custom of being able to read from Torah on the Shabbat before her Yahrzeit.

Certainly, when it comes to parents, they do (or in my case, did) a lot for kids so it is important to me to do the things I can to keep their memories alive and to honor them. So, putting in the time to learn the aliyah will certainly be worthwhile.

Jewish Holidays And Teaching

2008-08-15T11:46:00.001-07:00

I am currently in the process of devising my course syllabus for the upcoming semester. While I am only an adjunct, and I am only teaching on Tuesday/Thursday classes this year, the Jewish Holidays certainly pose a challenge. For the first time since I have been teaching, I am actually going to need to take off one day for each holiday. Usually because Yom Kippur is 10 days after Rosh Hashanah, (unlike the other holidays which are weeks apart, so they fall on the same day of the week), I don’t need four days. In fact, due to holidays on the weekends, there have been times I have been able to avoid taking days off.

I used to feel uncomfortable, bad, maybe even slightly guilty when I had to take classes off. I understand that class needs to be in session for a certain number of hours each semester and I felt I had an obligation. In addition, being an adjunct, it is not as easy as one might think to find someone to cover your classes.

I no longer feel guilty. The fact is, when the College wants something out of me, they do not hesitate to ask and I try to accommodate them. Still, and yes I am going back a couple of years, when I applied for a full-time teaching position at the College, I was not even brought in for an interview. So, they are willing to use me for what suits there needs but I am not good enough to even be considered for something full-time.

My feeling now is, I do what I need to. I make the necessary arrangements. Either I will send in a video tape, give them an in-class writing assignment or give them out of class time to research their speech. This will fulfill the needs of the college, and allow me to do what I need to do.

Still, with four days off over a month period, it does make it difficult to get into a routine. I’m sure, however, I will manage.

All Systems Go

2008-08-12T12:10:00.000-07:00

Three weeks ago I posted an entry about the trials and tribulations of trying to get in and sign a contract to continue teaching in the computer lab of the religious school where I have taught the past two years. After having the scheduled meeting cancelled numerous times (once by me and four or five times by them), the meeting finally took place. Everything went smoothly and I will be back there again come September.

In the meeting, I found out about plans to purchase additional software for the computer, upgrades that they want to make and some purchases for some computer accessories. They did ask for my input, which pleased me. I couldn’t help but think, “Good things come to those who wait.”

While I would like to get started, in terms of planing for the first few sessions, things have not yet been finalized. They still have to decide which teachers will be coming to the lab when. Obviously, until I know the age of the students and the subject the teacher is covering, it becomes difficult, if not impossible, to prepare a lesson plan.

Still, I am looking forward to preparing the plan and to the year ahead.

Fasting

2008-08-10T15:08:00.000-07:00

I know that it is not supposed to be easy but I am glad that the Tisha B’av fast is over. For me, I find this the toughest fast of all the ones on the Jewish Calendar. Although this one and Yom Kippur are both full 25 hour fasts, since this one takes place during the heat of summer and goes longer into the evening, meaning you have longer to go after you wake up the next morning, I find it tougher.

Perhaps if I brought my weight back under control, that might make it easier. While logic would seem to suggest that the more you eat heading into a fast, the easier it will be, the truth is that if you eat less, you slow your metabolism and that makes it easier to fast.

There was a time when I had my weight under control, I took off a lot of extra pounds. It is time to do that again. Will power, the help of others and maybe some diet pills will make it easier.

Regardless, I am glad this fast is now behind me.

Should We Tell Him About The Rocks?

2008-08-10T13:15:00.000-07:00

There is an old joke that has many variation but has to do with walking on the water. The version of the joke I know is about a Priest, a Rabbi and a Minister who go out fishing. While fishing, the Rabbi realizes that he left his ice water back at shore and says he is going to get it. He stands up, walks across the water, gets his drink, walks back and sits down next to his colleagues on the boat.

A few minutes later the Minister says that he is out of bait and has more back at shore and he is going to get it. He stands up, walks across the water, gets the bait, walks back and sits down next to his colleagues.

The Priest, upon seeing this, decides that if the Rabbi and the Minister can walk on water, certainly he, the Priest, can do so. He excuses himself explaining that he too left something back at shore and has to get it. He stands up and tries to walk across the water. He falls in and drowns. The Minister turns to the Rabbi and says, “Do you think we should have told him about the rocks in the water?”

As I indicated last week, for the first time in a number of years, I had the opportunity to listen to someone else do Haftorah. The Haftorah is swithcing back and forth between the traditional melody used for Haftorah and the traditional melody used on Tisha B’Av (which was Saturday night through Sunday night this year). The person who chanted Haftorah did so using the traditional Haftorah melody.

I remember the first time I did it that I received a phone call making sure I know about the changes in melody (which I did). I could not help but think someone should have done this for the person who chanted it this past week.

He did a nice job and I do not criticize him for not knowing. After all , the way you learn is by having someone tell you. I just felt the Shul fell short in its obligation to let this individual know.

Still, it was nice listening to someone else chant Haftorah and, as I said, he did a nice job.

Feeling Better

2008-08-08T17:26:00.000-07:00

An interesting question recently occurred when a friend of mine and I were having a discussion. We were talking about what Judaism had to say about weight loss. Obviously, there are those people who do not need to loss weight (unfortunately I am not in that category). For those who do, however, one can make a strong argument that Judaism strongly supports it, or my friend argued, requires it.

The reason is it is Judaism talks about doing what you can to preserve a life, especially your own. So, if ones health would improve if s/he would lose some weight, then you could argue that Judaism requires it. Fortunately, there are all sorts of programs and ways to lose weight, and one can find these almost anywhere, such as lap band central florida.

Getting The Day Off

2008-08-08T12:25:00.000-07:00

For the first time in a few years, I will be getting tomorrow off. Well, I am not really getting the day off but I am not reading Haftorah. As some oe you know and as I have discussed in previous posts, the melody used for this Haftorah (portion of Prophets that is read) switches back and forth between two melodies, the traditional Saturday melody used for Haftorah and the one that is used for Eichah (the book of Lamentations).

A number of years ago, after hearing someone chant it quite beautifully, I decided I wanted to learn it. It took me a number of years but I finally did. Certainly the internet helped as I was able to find a website where you can hear the Haftorah chanted. When the person who had done this Haftorah in the past moved out of the area, I volunteered. I have been doing this one ever since.

This year, apparently someone else volunteered and will now be chanting it. Both my wife and son asked me if I was disappointed. Certainly there is a concept in Judaism of having a “Chazkah” on something, that once you do something three consecutive times, it becomes yours.

The truth is I am not disappointed in the least. When I first volunteered I only expected to do this one once. It is my hope that perhaps my chanting this haftorah, despite my less than wonderful voice, may have inspired someone else to want to try. If so, then this really is a compliment and the highest form of flattery. If not, well then it is what I will choice to believe anyway.

And, for those of you fasting this Tisha B’Av, which starts this Saturday night, I wish you an easy fast.

R-E-S-P-E-C-T

2008-08-06T09:53:00.000-07:00

This past weekend I was out of town for my youngest nephew’s Bar Mitzvah. He did very well and I was quite proud of him. Since my mother-in-law is now in rehab, following a stroke, my wife did not join us, it was just me and my son. This was fine as I often have been, and sometimes still am, the one who brings him to shul. What I found interesting was the attitude he, and some others, had of the service.

My sister goes to an Orthodox synagogue. I am perfectly comfortable davening at an Orthodox shul (as well as Conservative or Reform). I am currently attending a Conservative synagogue since it is where my wife is most comfortable but I have enjoyed more traditional services as well.

My son, who does fairly well in services, was lost for part of it due to the “mumbling” sound that often takes place at such services. I do admit, I too prefer a service where people seem to be enjoying it as opposed to be praying to get out. I am not suggesting this is true of all Orthodox services nor that it doesn’t occur at Reform or Conservative services, but at times that did take place here. At other times, they did their fair share of singing.

I have a distant cousin who was there. He is not used to this type of service at all and actually fell asleep during part of it. I also have an aunt who was there and during part of the service took out a camera and started taking pictures, with a flash. (For those who don’t know, the use of a camera as well as using a flash are not permitted on Shabbat).

Still, for the most part, everyone seemed to try and respect each other’s wishes. Certainly that is important. Often time, the biggest problem we face as Jews is, trying to get along with one another. It is refreshing when you see people from all different backgrounds at least make an attempt.

Stranded

2008-07-24T11:06:00.000-07:00

In another couple of weeks I will be heading to my youngest nephew’s Bar Mitzvah. I am certainly looking forward to attending the event. Still, this is bitter-sweet. When my oldest nephew was Bar Mitzvah, both my parents were alive. My Mom had passed away by the time my middle nephew’s Bar Mitzvah rolled around but my Dad was still alive. Now, as the event closes in on my youngest nephew, neither of my parents are alive.

While I miss them all the time, it is at the joyous events like this that their presence is missed the most. They enjoyed these events and it meant a lot. It would only seem right to be able to look up and see them kvelling , see their smiling faces and being able to watch the schep nachas.

It is times like these that the stories come rushing to mind. For instance, when my middle nephew’s bar mitzvah rolled around, my sister, who lives in an Orthodox community, made arrangements for family and friends from out of town to stay by congregants nearby. Knowing that my dad (her’s too) had trouble with his legs and with walking, she made arrangements for him to stay by a family just down the street from the shul. My dad, a Reform Rabbi, indicated that he would prefer driving (a 15 minute trip by car from his house to the shul where my sister davens) but my sister told him it was important to her that he didn’t so my dad went along with it.

My family was staying with someone else but after service Friday evening I went with him to walk him to where he was staying. I followed him, assuming he knew where he was going. As we kept walking and didn’t see the house, he asked me to check the street sign and, you guessed it, we were on the wrong street, and we had walked pretty far.

Dad was done and unable to walk much further. He said to me, “I told your sister I should drive. I know who I am and what I am”. He then went to call a cab on his cell phone to take him to where he was staying.

As my dad is calling the cab company, I hear him say to the dispatcher, “I am a Reform Jew stranded in an Orthodox community”. He said it with such seriousness and not in a demeaning matter but more a matter of fact tone. I found the whole thing quite amusing.

Of course, the cab company got there and got my Dad to where he was staying and the rest of the events went fine. Those are the stories, the memories, that will certainly be treasured.

An Upcoming Haftorah

2008-07-23T12:57:00.001-07:00

I am curious to find out if I will be chanting the Haftorah before Tisha B’Av this year. I have done this for the past number of years and I enjoy it. It is not such an easy Haftorah to chant as the trope, the melody, switches back and forth four times between what is traditionally used on Shabbat and what is used for Tisha B’Av.

Normally, by this time, I have already been asked to do it since I have done it in the past and it is difficult for a new person to learn the switches. Obviously, it can be done as I did it for the first time once myself. In fact, it was not even that long ago, it was about eight years ago.

If someone else wants to do it, that is fine. I have done it for a number of years and do not mind letting someone else have a turn. If they want me to do it, again, I am fine with that as I have done it in the past. Still, if I am doing it, I want to look it over ahead of time. I have a feeling that a couple of days before it is time for the Haftorah to be read, someone is going to say something to me, as though it is a forgone conclusion that I will be chanting it.

As a result, I will probably look it over, just to be on the safe side. Still, it would be nice if I actually believed that I would get advanced notice if they wanted me to do it.

Are You Trying To Tell Me Something?

2008-07-22T13:34:00.000-07:00

I think the gods are trying to tell me something. For the past two years I have taught in the Computer Lab of a religious school. I enjoy this and have posted blog entries about my experiences. I expect to be teaching in the computer lab again next year, at the same religious school.

It should come as no surprise that what this school does is set up appointments with the teachers over the summer and have the individuals sign letters of intent and discuss and changes or any issues that need to be taken care of. The school contacted me to set up such a meeting about a month ago and we found a mutually acceptable date, or so I thought.

A couple of days before the scheduled meeting I got a call from the administration that they needed to reschedule as something had come up for one of the people I need to meet with. We rescheduled the meeting only for me to get another call a couple of days before that we needed to reschedule once again.

This time, I had something come up and a couple of days before the meeting, I called to reschedule. Again, we found a mutually acceptable date. Two days before that meeting I got another call and guess what? Yep! We needed to reschedule and we did.

I was so excited when I did not get a call two days before this meeting, asking me to reschedule. I showed up to this meeting only to find out that the secretary did not have me on the calendar and one of the people with whom I need to meet was not there. So, we have rescheduled once again.

It is a good thing that I know they like me there and that I cancelled one of these meetings, otherwise, I would be wondering (or be getting set to start wondering) what they are trying to tell me.

I actually have no doubt that I will be back there come September but honestly, it is getting a little frustrating.

Barbecues

2008-07-21T11:31:00.000-07:00

This past weekend, the family was invited over to some friends for a barbecue. The friends were not Jewish. That, in and off itself, is no big deal. The problem is the food. I will eat dairy food and fish out of the house, as well as Pareve food (food that is neither meat nor milk), unlike some people who keep kosher who insist that all the food must be certified kosher (and that is fine and even makes a lot of sense).

Before the first time we went over, my wife indicated to our friends what I would and would not eat. She said nothing meat or poultry but fish was fine, macaroni and cheese was fine, as well as some other items. Our friends ask my wife about chicken and she told them “no”. Naturally, when I went over, what did they have for me?—Chicken?

This past weekend it was a similar situation. Again, they made chicken for me. I thought it was thoughtful that they went out of their way to do something special for me, but in this instance, it is not like we have not discussed this issue with them.

Hopefully one more conversation will clear this up. I am not sure but I certainly hope so. I would like to avoid a situation where other I am eating food I am not comfortable eating or avoiding eating food that was especially prepared for me.

We’ll see what happens!

Stem Cell Research

2008-07-09T04:56:00.001-07:00

One issue that has been controversial for some time now has to do with stem cell research. Certainly most people do not argue that we should try and find cures for such terrible illnesses as Alzheimer’s and Parkinson’s. Still questions arise, especially out of certain religious circles, as to whether or not one is taking a life in order to perform stem cell research.

There is now a belief that stem cell research can be performed using a woman’s menstrual blood because there are stem cells in a woman’s blood. I am not sure how far along this process is and I am not certain if those who oppose such research would still object from a religious perspective. Still, the idea that this could happen is fascinating and, I think, gives no hope to the reality of all sides finding an agreeable solution to conduct stem cell research

There is more information about this process available on CNNMoney
I am fascinated by this process, especially seeing my grandfather suffer through the Alzheimer’s disease during the later years of his life. Hopefully articles like this can give hope to those who are currently watching loved ones suffer and in the end make it so many less individuals need to see it.

No New Job

2008-07-09T04:40:00.000-07:00

A letter came in today’s mail in regard to the computer position I applied for at the Jewish Day School. The letter was a format letter and basically said “Thank you but no thank you”. The rejection letter indicated that they found someone more qualified than I for the position.

I wish it had not been a format letter. I know the school was under no obligation to higher me and I don’t mean to sound arrogant or egotistical but I honestly believe for what they wanted, there was no one more qualified.

I am not claiming I am the smartest person ever when it comes to computers, far from it, but in terms of running a computer lab, having a background in the products they wanted to teach and working with teachers who are assigning work to their students on the computer, I have a strong background.

Certainly the school was under no obligation to higher me. They let me know from the beginning that if they found someone from within, it would make it easier than having to work around another person’s schedule from the outside. Again, I am fine with this; it makes sense. I just wish the letter would have told me that this is in fact what happened. Now, I am wondering if I did not get the position because they decided there was someone more qualified or if it was due to logistics. That is annoying.

I will probably call to find out as knowing, regardless of the outcome, would make me feel better.

The Right Stuff

2008-07-09T04:28:00.001-07:00

Teaching in the computer lab at the religious school where I work is a lot of fun and I appreciate that those in charge have always done what they kind to get me the necessary equipment (which is not always the newest).

For example, I prefer XP to Vista for an operating system. It is also important to be able to see the computer screen. As I get older, I know the type of glasses I wear are important. Sites like zennioptical.comhave made it easier to find the right glasses.

Whatever your needs for whatever the task, make sure you have the proper equipment.

Appearances Can Be Deceiving

2008-07-08T13:30:00.000-07:00

I was recently at a barbecue and I witnessed an unusual site. In fact, I even commented on it only to learn once again that things are not always what they seem.

There were a number of Jews and non-Jews at the barbecue. Some of us there kept kosher so they had kosher chicken available in addition to hotdogs and hamburgers. A friend, Jewish, took a piece of chicken but also grabbed a couple of pieces of sausage from a nearby pasta salad.

I am not one to preach to other what they should and/or should not do. This is a personal decision that is between each individual and his/her own G-d. Still, upon seeing this I teased my friend. He teased back about some of my own inconsistencies (don’t we all have them).

I explained that I was not being critical because he was eating Traiff (unkosher) food but rather because it was on his plate with kosher food as well. He explained that he was being careful with what he ate, healthy eating, and chicken was healthier and a better choice than hotdogs and hamburgers.

In fairness, I did see him calculate how many people there needed kosher food and count the number of pieces of chicken to make sure that there was enough for everyone. So, sometimes it is better not to start teasing until you have all the details. Still, it was humorous to see someone take a piece of kosher chicken and put it on the same plate as food that came from a pig.

Responding To Hate Speech

2008-06-29T06:37:00.000-07:00

I am grateful that we live in a society that tries to be politically correct. It is important to take the feelings of others into consideration. There are some negatives, however, to a politically correct society. The first is something that we have heard about for quite some time, that sometimes we go overboard (people aren’t fat or even heavy, they are horizontally challenged). Sometimes when we try to be so considerate of others feelings, we end up saying nothing. It does not mean we should not try, just that sometimes we go too far.

There is another problem as well. Sometimes when we are so politically correct, people do not know how to handle certain situations. When there are seventh and eighth grade religious school students who do not know about hate crimes and hate speech, perhaps we have taken things too far. When groups like The Progressive Action Alliance are looking to spread false information, we need to know how to respond. When this group in Houston Texas takes to Freeway Blogging , standing on highway overpasses and holding signs that say such things as “Israel out of the Middle East,” we need to know the appropriate way to respond.

Fortunately there are websites out there that look to let people know what is going on, let people know the truth. The internet can make it easier for groups like Progressive Action Alliance Houston to spread their hate speech. Fortunately the internet also makes it easier to get the accurate information out.

A Computer Position

2008-06-26T20:33:00.001-07:00

I recently met with the director of a Jewish Day school to find out about a teaching position that was advertised. It was an interesting position and an interesting interview.

The job itself has nothing to do with Jewish education, it is teaching in the computer lab. I would be teaching Microsoft office products as well as computer usage, internet and internet safety. It would also involve working with other teachers, especially if the student had an assignment which involved putting some kind of computer presentation together.

I like the fact that it would be with a Jewish Day school. While the position itself might not involve teaching Jewish subjects, it would be with a school that clearly understands the importance of that. Certainly I have the knowledge to teach such a class and being able to do it while showing support for Jewish education would thrill me.

I think we need to do whatever possible to get children, students, and even adults, interested in Jewish learning. Education is crucial and being able to be involved with any facility that understands its importance, that looks to educate people about Judaism is crucial.

The position is actually still being defined but certainly I am excited and look forward to hearing what happens.

Conversational Hebrew

2008-06-23T11:23:00.001-07:00

My son finishes school this week and is excited about summer plans. He will be attending a few different summer day camp programs; a week here, two weeks there, that sort of thing. He has, however, added something new to the mix.

Towards the end of Hebrew school, one of the teachers, an Israeli who teaches Hebrew, asked my son if he would like to be tutored in Hebrew over the summer. It is not that my son needs extra help in this area, but this teacher thought he might want to keep his skills sharp during the summer and have more of an opportunity to influence the material he is studying. I am sure from the teacher’s point of view as well, it is a good way to earn some extra income over the summer.

My son is very excited about this and wants to start the day after school ends. His father, on the other hand, has mixed reactions. On the one hand, I am thrilled that learning Hebrew is so important to him that he wants to do it when school is out and wants to keep his skills sharp. On the other hand, I question if he truly realizes the commitment he made and will put the time in to this. He wants to learn conversational Hebrew and he will be meeting with the tutor once a week for an hour.

The tutor has already tried to caution me that when it comes to conversational Hebrew, for many weeks it may look as though he is not learning much and then all of a sudden everything clicks. I question that. To expect to learn this while only putting an hour a week is seems unlikely, even if my son follows through with his “homework assignments”. I fear that he will get frustrated and fed-up and refuse to do the work outside of his meeting with the tutor.

Certainly it is worth an attempt. I hope that this does meet his needs and expectations and I hope it does help him learn to speak conversational Hebrew. And, given a choice between my son wanting to do this over the summer or do a number of other things, certainly I approve of his choice.

A Double Standard

2008-06-16T12:36:00.000-07:00

It is amazing, after all this time, how a double standard can still work. I am not referring to the traditional double standard but I am talking about how it works when one examines religion and the attitudes of society.

I am involved with a civic organization. In fact, I am the incoming president. We meet every other Wednesday and I noticed that based on the calendar, we are scheduled to have a meeting on Yom Kippur. I told people I was not going to schedule a meeting on this date as I did not feel it sent the right message. Moreover, I argued that if I were just a member and a president scheduled a meeting on this date, I would be furious so, I refused to do what I would object to any other club president doing.

The rest of the Executive Committee objected and fought with me. I heard all sorts of excuses and reasons why it could not be done and basically, I was told with the exception of Christmas day, we do not move meetings, and that exception occurs because there is no place open where we could meet.

I then noticed that we had a meeting scheduled for New Years Eve. Certainly establishments are open yet I told the board I did not think we should meet on this day either. They were all quick to agree. Then when I pointed out that if we just switched it with another date, we would end up meeting on Christmas Eve (Not day) and I did not want to do that. Everyone agreed and worked with me on getting creative to avoid that conflict.

The Christian holidays still carry much more weight than even a holiday like Yom Kippur. People do not understand its importance. Still, once I led the discussion about Christmas and New Years, everyone was more willing to work with me on avoiding a meeting on Yom Kippur. It just surprises me (although it shouldn’t) the double standard when it comes to holidays.

Jewish Jeopardy

2008-06-13T13:20:00.000-07:00

I made reference to a Jewish Jeopardy game in a post yesterday. The game took place on Shavout. The tradition is to stay up all night and study. While I have done this a few times, it always seems that the shul (synagogue) I am affiliated with at any particular time has older members and they do not go through the night. This is true of both the Conservative and Orthodox shuls where I have gone. Still, they want to do something, so for part of the evening they have a study group.

This year, the synagogue had two things going on. First was a discussion about Judaism and the environment. It sounded interesting but not necessarily fun. The second thing was the Jewish Jeopardy game and the rest of the family was into that (so was I), so I decided to attend that session.

The first game was a kids only game and the kids teamed up in groups of two. My son showed that he has paid attention and that he understands his Judaism. It makes a father proud. The second game was Adults only, also in pairs of two, and the third game was also supposed to be adults only.

For the third game, many adults did not want to play so the third team was made up of kids only. I think I saw my son raise his hand for every question, well just about every question, for that game. Again, it is nice when you can see your hard work pay off. And, I certainly have put in my share of hard work. My wife is not nearly as much of a shul goer as I am so, when he was an infant, I used to get him ready and have him there every week, and deal with the dirty looks of the adults and comments because, as much as they like kids, they want them perfectly quiet. Still, I wanted him to understand right from the beginning that on Shabbat, this is what we do and where we go.

He may not go as frequently now as he did in the past but he still goes more often than not and enjoys it and, as I said before, he learns and he remembers.

Congratulations on your Jeopardy game.

The Forgotten Holiday

2008-06-12T21:04:00.000-07:00

The holiday of Shavout is now behind us. It is the last Biblical holiday of the year. Arguably it is one of the most important ones as, without it, the Jews never got the Torah and then there is no need to keep any of the holidays.

I wonder how many people know little about this Holiday. Certainly it does not get the notoriety of Channukah, the attendance of a Rosh Hashanah or Yom Kippur service, or the appreciation of Passover. To make matters even more confusing, there is not a symbol that is simply and solely associated with Shavout.

You could argue the Torah is such a symbol but we use that year round. Certainly the other holidays have their symbols. This is an important and beautiful holiday and it does not get the recognition. Most people, Jewish and non-Jewish, are probably not even aware that there was a holiday at the beginning of the week.

I am glad that my son is familiar with the holidays and enjoys them all. I had a chance to watch him in action in a game of Jewish Jeopardy and he knew a lot, but that is a post for another time.

The Last Day

2008-06-03T13:45:00.001-07:00

In the past, I have blogged about the first day of Hebrew School for my son, how they have a festival outside and a barbecue as a way of trying to set a positive tone for the year. It has been successful in the past and I think it is a great idea. It is interesting then that the first day of school is a fun experience but the last day of school, traditionally one that everyone looks forward to, is a negative experience.

The concept is good. The want to do a schoolwide arts festival. It starts with a schoolwide T’filah (paryer service) with each class leading a different prayer. While praying is not an art, based on the poetry you find in the prayers and the singing and different melodies, the feeling is there are aspects of the arts in prayer, so it is appropriate. I have no problem with this part.

After the service is over they leave the sanctuary and go to the auditorium where some of the different groups perform. The sound system is always terrible. It is hard to understand what is going on and while parents might enjoy watching their kids perform (even if the performance is not that great), the kids are bored. Even those who perform are bored once their part is finished.

In addition, the teachers are supposed to meet the kids and sit as a class and the parents are supposed to sit with the kids as well. The teachers do not take this seriously, and some of them, at times, are leading various groups in performance. Some teachers do not even meet the kids but just let the parents bring their child(ren) upstairs. Still, the parents have to figure this out. It is utter chaos.

I have seen it gone down hill every year. Every year my son gets more agitate and frustrated. What is supposed to be an enjoyable event is really anything but. The program also goes longer than a regular day of Hebrew school.

This year they sent out an e-mail, almost begging parents to bring the kids to the program and not have them miss the last day of school. Still, each year less and less kids show up. My wife and I have always made sure to bring our son but we both feel that next year, we are just going to skip it.

As a side note, often times when someone complains, the feeling is don’t just complain, offer an alternative. So, here goes: They should continue to keep the school wide T’filah and they should continue to have the band play a few selections. Beyond that, each teacher should be responsible for teaching their class once Israeli/Hebrew song (it can be coordinated by the principal if so desired). The song should be no more than five minute. Each class performs their song and when finished, have a hotdog roast (as they do now) and let the kids out early. That’s my suggestion!

New Software

2008-05-22T13:43:00.001-07:00

The Religious School year is over. Those of us who teach specials, (I am in the computer lab) finish slightly before the classroom teachers. I enjoy what I do and can certainly use the equipment they provide but it would be nice if they upgraded the machines and also looked to bring in some new software programs.

I am always amazed by what is out there and what is being developed by different people and companies. IT has been a couple of years since the school has purchased any new programs. Based on what they have and what is available on the web, I rely don't need them to get anything new but, it is nice to have some new 'toys'. It would be interesting to see if they come out with something I could use in the Computer Lab of the Religious School where I teach.

Too Much Passover

2008-04-25T12:59:00.001-07:00

I do not know about the rest of you but I am ‘Passovered out’. Okay, I admit to feeling as thought I had eaten enough matzah after the end of the first Seder. Things were very nice and very enjoyable. Still, I find working during Hol Ha’moed, the intermediate days, is very difficult.

Perhaps things would be just as difficult no matter what but it is the little things that I won’t do that make things more difficult. For instance, when I am teaching, I do not stop to get a cup of coffee before heading to class. When I have my late night class, I end up bringing food from home for lunch and dinner. Passover food tends to be quite heavy and takes a lot out of me.

I do enjoy the Holiday of Passover. I even enjoy the Passover foods. I just wish that I could eat them in addition to the other foods. Okay, so each year, for a week I can manage and I really do not complain, but this year it really seems to have taken its toll on my stomach and my overall mental approach. I find myself feeling more tired and just not energized.

So, to anyone else feeling like me, I say, “Hang in there. It is just another couple of days and you can do it!”

Overseas Friends

2008-04-16T12:06:00.000-07:00

I do not know how many of you are getting your phone lists ready but I know I am. Like many other people who celebrate the Jewish Holidays, I find that I call my Jewish friends a few times a year to wish them a ‘Good Yontif’.

I call friends and family before Rosh Hashanah, the Jewish New Year. I call them before (and after) Yom Kippur, the Day of Atonement. I also call them before Passover. As I said, I know a lot of people do this.

Of course, it can get to be expensive. Certainly calling most people inter and intra state is not bad and many of us have a phone plane where we can make all the calls we want for one set monthly fee. Unfortunately these plans do not include overseas calls.

I do have some friends in Israel and I like to call them as well. It is really the only times we speak (although we do correspond in other methods throughout the year). Still, if there is a way where the cost of these calls can be kept under control, it is certainly appreciated.

There are now prepaid phone cards to international locations, which might be able to help. Whether you are looking to for india phone cards, or to call Israel or another location, it might just be a way to save some money.

Passover Foods

2008-04-16T11:17:00.000-07:00

It is amazing to see all the Kosher for Passover products you can find these days. I am not saying they are any good but you can find muffins, bagels and pizza that is all Kosher for Passover. Some of the products I definitely stay away from. Some I just have a problem with conceptually. For instance, we are not supposed to eat break on Passover so I do not want any Kosher for Passover bread (unless you consider Matzah to be such an item).

Matzah is not my favorite food. I have actually felt that Passover would be a wonderful Holiday if we could eat bread. Still, I do enjoy the Holiday and the foods. I think that for a week there are certain products we can do without. Moreover, the taste of a number of food items has been greatly improved.

I also am amazed to see the great variety of Kosher (and Kosher for Passover) wines. It used to be that all you could get was the disgustingly sweet wines. Actually, perhaps based on nothing but tradition, I like the taste of that. Still, with four cups of wine at the Seder, it is nice to know you can find all different types of wine.

Wishing you all (at least those who celebrate it) a Happy and Kosher Passover.

Making Friends

2008-04-15T15:32:00.002-07:00

One of the things I enjoy about blogging is getting a chance to read comments that other people post in regard to my posts. This can actually be quite educational and can help improve the blog. It also gives you the opportunity to establish an on-line friendship with people who have the same interest as you.

There are actually sites where people can register to find people who have similar interests; where they can establish new friendships and see if they can find old friends as well. For instance, people may want to join 3gb community www.3gb.biz for such purposes.

My Favorite Sessions

2008-04-15T15:32:00.001-07:00

As I am on break from teaching Hebrew school, I am taking some time to reflect on the computer lab sessions I have taught so far this year. I find reflection often helps me improve my lessons in the future. What I find most interesting is the computer lab session I have enjoyed the most have not necessarily been the ones that the students have enjoyed the most.

The kids enjoy the sessions where they can play games. I do try to work in some time each week to allow the students to play Jewish related computer games, but it is far from the focus. The students also like it when they can color on the computer. I do not find this surprising for the little ones but older students too enjoy coloring. Again, I do try to work this in fairly frequently, but it too is far from my favorite type of lesson.

I enjoy the educational sessions. There was one class where the students, who were studying jewish culture around the world, had to come into the lab and using their own links, or some that I provided, find out about a culture they had not yet studied and answer some question about that culture on a worksheet I designed.

I also liked the plans where the students had to research famous Jews but they had to find at least three ways the person did something to show his/her Jewishness. If they could not, they had to find a different person. Another class where the students had to find Jewish hate sites was also fascinating.

I guess it is true that education is (or at least can be) wasted on the young.

Thank You

2008-04-15T13:54:00.000-07:00

In this day and age when so much is done on line and you can send greeting cards on line, I feel it means so much to get a hand written thank you not. I have always felt that way about Thank you cards. I remember when I worked at day camp one summer, it was customary for the parents to tip the counselors at the end of the summer. The camp recommended (keep in mind this was a number of years ago) between $20-$30. I remember feeling I would rather get a $25 tip and a Thank you card, with a hand written note, than a $30 tip. Okay, I am materialistic enough that I would rather a $30 tip and no card than a $20 tip, but the point is, money gets spent, Thank you Cards are a personalized item you can keep forever.

I have found, over the years, what works well for me is to keep a box of nice Thank you Cards on hand, in a safely stored area (hopefully I’ll be able to remember where I put them). Then, when I need one, I can easily get one, write the note immediately and get it out.

The personal touch goes a long way. So, if you are heading over to someone’s Seder for Passover, why not make sure you have a box of Thank You notes on hand.

Strawberry Shortcake

2008-04-15T13:53:00.000-07:00

I love the way traditions get started and work their way into people’s religious ceremonies. Truth is I do enjoy ‘minhag’. Certainly this has kept our people alive and helped us maintain our identity. Still, not only can it be exhausting but if someone wants to change things up a little, it can be quite difficult, if not impossible.

My Mother-in-law’s birthday falls during Passover this year. For her, this is nothing new as they two frequently coincide. Growing up, her mother always made her a Kosher-for-Passover Strawberry Shortcake for the Seder to celebrate her birthday.

It so happens my niece (my Mother-in-law’s granddaughter) also has a birthday that falls around Passover. My wife found a recipe for a chocolate chip cake. She wanted to make that for the birthdays’. She was actually excited about trying a new recipe. (I too like new recipes but usually like to try them on myself first before making them for other people).

Guess what? When my wife told her mom about the recipe, her Mom asked (perhaps whined is a better word) for a Strawberry Shortcake? You know what that means? My wife is no longer making the chocolate chip cake for the birthdays, she is making a Strawberry Shortcake.

In the words of Tevye, “Tradition! Without it where would our people be?”

On Break!

2008-04-14T09:51:00.000-07:00

I have the week off from teaching religious school. Actually, I have more than the week off. Since most of the Religious schools follow the regular schools and this is the week they have off for Spring break, I have it off too. Then, I get the next two Sundays off because of Passover. This means I only have to more Sundays to teach and it gives me time to do a nice job preparing the lessons, assuming I do not procrastinate, which is always a possibility.

As I think back on the lesson plans I put together and looking for websites to which I could bring the student, it occurs to me that the way a site is designed often has a lot to do with if and how I use it. I am looking for something that will catch my eye and is not difficult to navigate. I am also looking for something that will appeal to the particular age group I have coming into the computer lab that week.

Programming of the site is crucial. There have been times I have not used a site that I thought would be good because the layout was not effective. Some are quite professional, some may have a max web design, others are not so effective.

Cooking And Cleaning

2008-04-14T09:42:00.000-07:00

As my wife and I prepare for the Seder and are busy cleaning the house and getting everything set, the parody of the song My Favorite Things, keeps going through my head.

A few years ago I actually put my own Passover Hagadah together. In addition to all the traditional parts, I included some extra readings, interpretations and silly ‘stuff’. Some of the silly stuff includes various songs.

As I said, this one is sung to the tune of My favorite Things. It starts:

“Cooking and cleaning and so many dishes; Out with the chametz, no pasta, no knishes;
Fish that’s gefilted, horseradish that stings; these are a few of our Passover things.”

There is, of course, more, but I do not have the words in front of me right now. What is amazing is how much material you can find on the internet for people of all ages. It actually is worth it to take a moment and go through the material and find one or two things that will make the Seder meaningful to you and your guests. Yes, it is a little extra work, although depending on how far you want to go, it does not have to be that much work. Still, it can help to make the Seder more meaningful to everyone who is there, children, adults, Jews and non-Jews alike.

Wishing everyone a Happy Passover!

Jewish Wisdom

2008-04-08T11:58:00.001-07:00

I am currently reading a book about Jewish Wisdom with my son. The book deals with folklore (some may be accurate) about situation famous Jews have been in where there life has been in danger and how they were able to get out of the situation using peaceful methods.

My son has asked a seemingly innocent question about why these people could not just have called the police. Certainly you would think with all the law enforcement agencies, with the various images that are projected, often through what people wear, such as 5.11 gear that protections have always been offered to those in need.

I honestly hope that my son will still be this idealistic in another ten to twenty years.

You're Right And You're Right And You're Right Too

2008-04-08T11:16:00.000-07:00

I recently read an opinion piece on line about the Holocaust Museum in Washington DC. The author talked about what a moving experience it was and that the Museum was well done. Having been there, I agree. Still, I thought about an attitude my father, Z’’L used to have.

My father, who had taught college classes on the Holocaust and understood the importance of teaching the subject, also felt we needed to offer more. He objected to those people who would argue ‘We need to be Jewish because of all the suffering and persecution other Jews have endured.’ My father felt that was a terrible message to send. When Judaism has so much to offer, so much excitement, the best we can do is tell people to be Jewish because other people were persecuted. Is the message that maybe ‘You too can be persecuted?’

My Dad felt that when it came to the Holocaust, or any other chapter dealing with the Persecution of Jews, it should be taught, but it should only be one aspect. Museums that deal with this subject need to include exhibits about ‘Living Judaism’ and how it is practiced today and the fun and excitement it offers. He claimed that there were excellent examples of such Museums in New York City.

I guess you can put me in the Teyve category of “You’re right and you’re right and you’re right too”. I think that perhaps the most powerful message that can be sent about the Holocaust is when a museum deals only with the Holocaust. Still, I think it is important that people today understand not only about the tragedies but about the joys of being Jewish. So, how can they both be right? In the words of Tevye, “You know, you’re right too!”

Seder Length

2008-04-08T00:57:00.000-07:00

As the Passover Seder approaches, I have been spending time looking through the Haggadah and deciding what I want to add to the Seder and what I want to skip, and everything in between. Perhaps like many people running a Seder, I have a challenge in terms of how long I go as people will want to get to the meal. In addition, dealing with certain medical issues, it is imperative that some people eat at a particular time.

What has worked well for me over the years is to tell me when we start that we will be at the meal by a certain time, or in a certain amount of time, such as within an hour to an hour-and-a-half. When my son was younger, I used to ask him to help me by chiming like a grandfather clock every 15 minutes so I had an idea of where I was at. He did and it was a good way to keep a four or five year old interested in the service.

I am tempted to move the wall clock in our kitchen to the Seder area this year. It was a beautiful clock my parents had hanging in their kitchen which, after they passed away, I claimed for my own. It would be one way to still ‘have them at my Seder’. The problem with moving it now is, I think it will invite people to keep an eye on the time too closely. I think this year I’ll make the announcement about the time frame but I won’t do anything in terms of having visible clocks nearby. Those who want to track the time will just have to rely on their own watches and will hopefully do it nonchalantly.

Non-Jews At The Seder

2008-04-07T14:26:00.000-07:00

As we are getting ready for Passover, it occurred to me that while we will be having a number of guests coming to our Seder, few people are Jewish. My Mother-in-law will be there, she is Jewish. My Brother-in-law will be there and he is Jewish also, although his wife is not and then, certainly according to Jewish Law, neither is their daughter. The remaining seven people are not Jewish.

From my wife’s perspective this is fine, if not great. It gives us the opportunity to share our practices with other people from other religions. I always enjoy sharing religion and culture with others and learning about their religion, but part of me also likes the idea of being able to experience Jewish experiences with other Jews.

Traditionally Passover is actually not considered the Jewish Holiday for inviting non-Jews; that distinction belongs to Rosh Hashanah as it is the birthday of the world, meaning a holiday for everyone to share. Still, in practice, Passover has become a traditional time to invite non-Jews.

As I said, I am pleased and proud to share the Seder table with people who are not Jewish. Still, to me, the Seder is not just an eating experience but a religious service and ceremony, a religious experience. As a result, I would enjoy sharing the Seder with others who felt that way, with others who would want to talk about their understandings of Passover, as discussion is very much a key element of the Seder.

For now I will enjoy sharing the Seder with those who are coming but for future years I would like to make sure that we have some individuals as well who understand Passover and are interested in talking about the Holiday and the Seder.

Coming Home Early

2008-04-04T14:36:00.001-07:00

My son requested that I try to come home early today. Why did he want me home early? It was not to play or go outside or get him something. He wanted me home so we could go through the Haggadah and practice.

This, as far as I am concerned, indicated two things to me. The first is that Passover is rapidly approaching and it is definitely time to start getting ready. The second was how fortunate I am. Teaching at a religious school and seeing the attitude of school age children, it is quite rewarding that my son is interested in practicing, in reading the Haggadah. He has already informed me that he wants to lead various parts of the Seder.

So, it is time to dig out the Haggadahs (which is easier said than done since we moved into our house between last year’s Seder and the one that will be occurring this year and I am not sure where they are), and begin practicing the Four Questions and other parts of the Seder with my son. I am definitely looking forward to it and I love the fact that, for my son, the holiday is not just about Shulhan U’Ruach (The Seder meal) but about an entire religious experience.

Assessment Tests

2008-04-02T06:25:00.001-07:00

Yesterday at the Hebrew school where I teach, the students were given an assessment test. It is basically the same test given to all the students in the school, third grade through sixth grade, to see what they know, what they have learned and their weaknesses.

I was helping out in one of the classrooms yesterday and I was talking with the teacher before class got started. She indicated that she thought this was poor timing for the test but understood that it has to be done within the next couple of weeks before the Passover break. She also indicated that she felt at one time it was too confusing and now it was watered down as they were only asking the students to identify 10 different letters to get a feel on how well they knew the entire Hebrew alphabet.

I came at this from a slightly different point of view. I asked the teacher if the test was going to tell her anything she did not already know about the students. She thought for a moment and acknowledged it would not. I understand the need for tests and assessments. I understand the need to have a measuring stick. Still, I think, in this case, where the teachers should know their kids, it is unnecessary.

I guess it does give the office a supposedly objective measure so they can check up on both students and teachers but I am not convinced, in this case, it is necessary or even a good thing.

The Holocaust

2008-03-31T12:06:00.001-07:00

Yesterday in the computer lab at the religious school where I teach I found a reaction both rewarding and disturbing at the same time. It was seventh and eighth graders that came into the lab. The teacher had actually been discussing hatred of Jews with them over the past few weeks. He wanted them to go to sites that preached Jewish hatred so they could see what others were saying.

I actually liked this assignment as it gives people a chance to see the lies that are told, the hatred that exists and how, this is something that is preached about all Jews, even those who do not identify with the religion. One problem we ran into is, not surprisingly, a number of these sites were blocked. I was able to find a few sites they could get to and we also had the students examine those sites that look to expose sites that preach hatred and prejudices.

One of the sites we were able to get to was one which claimed the Holocaust was a Jewish hoax and never really happened. The sites did show some of the images from the Holocaust. I still have not exactly figured out why a site claiming the Holocaust is fictional would include actual images but that is a topic for another time. A number of the students were reading the information and using a hand to cover up the images on the computer screen. Reading the words was fine, seeing the pictures was not.

I found it gratifying that 12, 13 and 14 year olds would find this disturbing, that it would bother them to the extent that it did. Sometimes we become so desensitized to such images it is a shame. It was, in an awkward sense, a positive experience.

On the other hand, I found it depressing that many of these students had never seen images from the Holocaust and some did not even know what it was. There was a time that no one could have started seventh grade having been that sheltered from this tragic episode of Jewish history. I think it is unfortunate that children this old are still being sheltered from the information and pictures. We must continue to be bothered by this but we must continue to make sure we are educating today’s students about these events.

Parents Expectations

2008-03-27T13:35:00.000-07:00

My son has started playing the viola this year. He enjoys it but, quite honestly, he is not very good. Obviously, he has recently started so I am not expected great things from him (at least not yet). Still, there is another problem. He does not want to practice. This does not mean he does not want to play the instrument; he just wants to be able to pick it up when it is time to play and dazzle everyone without having but the time and effort into it.

I actually understand this. When I was younger, I played trombone. The same could be said of me. I wanted to play and play well but I did not want to spend time, or waste time, practicing.

As a parent, I try to urge my son to practice and put the necessary time in. It has just as much of an impact on him as it did on me when my parents used to make the same argument. But, what happens when parents have the same expectations as children, that they should be able to avoid practicing and just pick up an instrument when they want and play like a professional?

This past week I was at a teachers’ meeting for the Hebrew school where I teach. The discussion ultimately came to what parents expect us to teach their children. Of course, each parent is going to have a different feeling about this. Still, it occurred to me that the parents, in large part, want the same thing as their children.

The children come in to Hebrew school and tell you they do not want to be there. They are only in class for three-and-a-half to four hours a week. They do not want to have to pay attention. They want to be able to talk with their friends. They do not want to do any work at home but they want to leave being able to speak and read Hebrew fluently. The parents seem to think this is a fair expectation. I have heard some parents tell teachers “It is only Hebrew school,” or ask “Why did you separate my child from her friend, they just want to be able to talk”. Still, those parents do not understand why, when their child comes home why s/he is unable to speak fluently.

In addition, the parents want to avoid doing anything in the home to help this education. They want to have someone baby sit their child and be the surrogate for teaching Hebrew and Judaism, giving the child a Jewish identity. Again, it does not work like that. What is taught at Hebrew School must be reinforced at home.

I am not sure what the solution to the problem is, or if you will ever be able to solve it but borrowing a concept from Perkei Avot (although making some modifications to make my point), “Just because you will not solve the problem, it does not exempt you from trying and discussing it”. By the way, I believe the actual quote from Perkei Avot is, “Just because you will not finish the job, you are not exempt from starting it”.

Disrespectful Students

2008-03-26T20:18:00.000-07:00

I find students who refuse to learn particularly aggravating and annoying. In the Hebrew school where I teach, we started teaching about Passover. I know that the students have heard this numerous times and think it is boring, but the truth is this is fascinating stuff and arguably applies to us more in today’s times than in years gone by.

Passover, more than any other holiday in the Jewish religion reflects the current time. Things have been added to the Haggadah (The Passover story) due to the things that were going on at a particular time in history. The story is about going from degradation to affirmation. That is something that we have all experienced at one time or another.

It does not need to be a religious event we are talking about. Simply the fact of being able to overcome adversity speaks to us and deals with the Passover theme. Unfortunately what I saw today were students who simply decided this was boring and did not give the teacher a chance. In addition, I saw students who were simply rude and obnoxious to the teacher.

In order to make it interesting, the students need to at least care a little bit. Today, I did not see this take place.

Cults Revisited

2008-03-25T17:49:00.000-07:00

I was reviewing some comments left on some of my blog posts earlier today. Somehow, some of these comments escaped me and I ended up reading them for the first time today. An interesting set of comments had to do with cults. I have been accused of being closed minded, admitting to it and feeling that only my view should be voiced.

These comments bring to mind a number of reactions. First of all, I am a strong supporter of the First Amendment, probably stronger than anyone who left a comment suggest I was intolerant of a point of view other than my own. I actually am an absolutist when it comes to the First Amendment, a position the Supreme Court as a whole has NEVER accepted. That being said, if I am sponsoring an event, DO NOT expect me to give air time to points of view that are dangerous.

Recently, the Fire Department held a seminar about fire safety where I live. Those biased individuals refused to give my friends who are pyromaniacs and arsonists an opportunity to voice the opposition to fire safety. How dare they prohibit the opposing viewpoint from being offered.

After I left the seminar on fire safety, I went to hear a speaker talk about the importance of the Church in today’s society. There was someone in attendance who was heckling the speaker and urging everyone to pick up a copy of the New Testament and set it on fire, leaving it next to the lit candles in the church. Can you believe the audacity of the church? Not only did they not give this person a chance to voice the opposition, they actually had the person removed.

As stated in my response to the initial comment in the previous post, when schools bring in police officers to talk about staying away from strangers, they somehow forget to invite a kidnapper in to urge the children to talk to strangers and take rides with people they do not know.

Obviously, there are times when it is unacceptable to voice the opposing side of an argument, especially if you are the sponsoring group. I have ALWAYS taught my son that we need to be respectful of people and their religious beliefs (Does that include Satanic Worship as well, which is also an organized form of religious belief). I have taught him that we should enjoy watching people enjoy their religion. I want and expect the same courtesy in return. When organizations like Jews-For-Jesus and others openly try to proselytize, when certain cults look to remove people from their families and force their ideas of values and religion down the throats of those people who have been kidnapped and/or brained washed, that is not showing the same courtesy.

Make no mistake about it. Jews for Jesus is a dangerous cult that looks to confuse people, not show them the light. Do not expect me to offer them a forum to preach their dangerous beliefs.

Amalek Lives!

2008-03-23T21:36:00.000-07:00

I am not so naïve as to suggest that anti-Semitism does not exist; I know it does. Still, sometimes something happens that just drives the point home as to home strong it is.

A few days ago I was working on putting a lesson plan together for Hebrew school. I was on the internet and entered a few key words dealing with famous Jews. A number of sites came up as a result of my search, many that were usable. There was also one site that came up that was basically a site promoting anti-Semitism.

As I said before, I know it exists, and I know such websites exist. Still, when you come across one and read the misinformation and lies on the site, it is amazing. It basically look to perpetuate every negative myth and stereotype about Jews. All Jews are rich it proclaims and Jews control the world’s money. It brought to mind an old Archie Bunker line from All in the Family where Mike (The son-in-law) says, “Not all Jews have money,” and Archie responds, “I’ve never meet one who doesn’t”.

The difference of course is, while many people took him seriously, Archie Bunker was a character designed to show just how foolish such opinions were and how ignorant people were who had this belief. Years ago when I worked in the Bible Belt, a co-worker (who had never come across Jew in his life) commented that I was nothing like what he imagined based from the stereotypes and he wanted to know how they got started.

The site goes on to say that Jews are liars and cheaters. It goes so far as to praise Hitler for trying to fix the problem of the Jews. It is scary to see such hatred and ignorance.

We have just finished reading the story of Purim. I would like to believe we have come a long way. Unfortunately we haven’t. Amalek still lives!

No Basis In History

2008-03-21T14:32:00.001-07:00

I had always assumed, since Purim was a post-Biblical holiday, one could find historic references to the holiday. Having done some LIMITED research on the internet today, I was fascinated to find that there really is not any recorded reference to the events outside of the Magilah.

It all started when I went to shul (services) this morning to hear the Magilah reading. After services I stayed for a little breakfast and conversation. One of the people talked about what a ‘Nice story’ this is and while it is looking to teach us a lesson, it has no basis in fact. I argued that it did, again making the claim that as a post-Biblical holiday, of course you can find reference to at least some of the events.

“Where,” asked my friend and I told him I would look it up. “You do that,” he responded.

I then set out to do my research via the internet. What I was able to find was that King Ahashvarush, whom we read about in the Magilah, is believed to be Xerxes. There apparently is no mention of Vashti (The queen that King Ahashhvarush banishes) or of Esther, the woman he picks to be his new queen and the one who ultimately saves the Jews.

Apparently most people believe the story of Esther to be ‘historic fiction’. Certainly religion requires a certain amount of faith. People can believe without having a basis in fact or in history. Still, I just found it interesting that there was not historic writings outside of the Megilah to back up, at least some of the facts, of the Purim story.

Adloyadah

2008-03-20T11:13:00.000-07:00

Tonight begins the holiday of Purim. It is a lot of fun and it is one of the non-Biblical holidays. The story takes place in Persia where the wicked Haman, an advisor to the King, King Ahashvarush, devised a plot to kill all the Jews because one Jew, Mordechai, refused to bowed down to the advisor.

Through a series of unlikely events, the King needs a new Queen and holds a pageant, Esther, a Jew, is chosen. She hides the fact that she is Jewish from Ahashvarush until she feels the time is right. She and Mordechai ultimately save the entire Jewish people and it is Haman who ends up being hung on the gallows he had built to use for hanging Mordechai and other Jews.

The holiday is actually a fun holiday. It involves dressing up in costumes, having parties, putting on silly plays, eating and drinking. My father used to refer to this as the Jewish equivalent of Mardi Gras. Mardi Gras is the last time to get silly before Christians get serious for the upcoming holiday of Easter. Purim is the last time to get silly before Jews get serious about the upcoming holiday of Passover.

The customs of the holiday of Purim include giving money to the poor, giving gifts of food to others (M’shaloach Manot), hearing the Magilah (the story of Purim) read in the evening and then again in the morning, and getting so drunk you do not know the difference between the phrases “Blessed is Mordechai” (The hero) and “Cursed is Haman” (The villain). In Hebrew the term is Adloyadah, or ad d’lo yadah and translates to ‘Until you don’t know the difference’.

While this is a fun holiday and one in which many do drink, it is important to consider why this is a commandment. The idea is on Purim, many things are hidden. G-d is not even mentioned in the Magilah, the story of Purim. Still, with the way things happened, it is a foregone conclusion that G-d played a major role in the miracle.

You are probably wondering how this has anything to do with drinking. When we appear before a ruler or someone whom it is important we make a good impression, we are on our best behavior. Often times we ‘hide’ those things we don’t want others to see. Certainly if it is important to make a good impression on some people in society, it is even more important to make a good impression on G-d. This we might try to ‘hide’ certain faults we have. When we drink, we have less control over our behavior and actions. It becomes harder for us to ‘hide’ things and G-d has an opportunity to judge us not at our best, but arguably at our worst.

Regardless of what you believe or want to believe, the bottom line is the holiday is a lot of fun and a time to enjoy. And, as dad would point out, once the holiday is over, it is time to get serious and begin our Passover preparations.

I wish one and all a Happy and Frailach Purim!

The Megilah

2008-03-19T10:39:00.000-07:00

Tomorrow night starts the holiday of Purim. While most people are not familiar with the holiday, it is a fun holiday. Being that it is post Biblical, there are not THAT many laws associated with it and, of course, all the laws that are associated with it are from the Rabbis and not from G-d.

One of the laws associated with the holiday is to hear the reading of the Megilah, the scroll that contains the story of Purim. One is supposed to hear it twice, once at night and once the following morning. I had been concerned as to how I would get to a reading this year. I teach an Evening class on Thursdays until 9PM so it would not be feasible to get to a reading. On Friday morning, I have another class I teach that is about an hour away. While I could probably get to a reading in the morning, it would be cutting things close.

Then I looked at the College schedule and learned that I had this week off from teaching. It is Spring break. I am not surprised that they had the bring coincide with Good Friday (no Jews in the area of the college).

Yesterday I indicated that I like it when Easter and Passover fall in close proximity to each other. I still feel that way. With my current teaching schedule, however, the way that it is, this works well for me, having Purim and Easter fall in close proximity. I can now get to a reading on both days.

I expect to talk more about the holiday of Purim and the laws associated with it in tomorrow’s post but for now I will just wish all of those who celebrate the holiday a Happy Purim and I will rejoice in the fact that I will be able to partake in the festivities.

Passover And Easter

2008-03-18T21:00:00.001-07:00

This year is one of those rare times that Easter Sunday does not fall right around Passover. I, for one, am a little disappointed.

Everyone always takes time to discuss how Chanukah and Christmas are similar. Really they are not, they are very different holidays. Passover and Easter, on the other hand, truly do have a lot of similarities and I think when the holidays fall close together, it allows more people to focus on those similarities.

Now, while I say the holidays are similar, obviously they have their differences; they commemorate different things. Still both are Spring holidays, holidays of renewal and rebirth, and that is no accident. Easter commemorates the renewal of life as the belief is that is the day their lord rose from the dead. Passover, however, also is about renewal. Up until this holiday the Jews were slaves and had not gained an identity as a religion. That does not come until the Jews leave Egypt and gain their freedom. The Jewish people, then, are being reborn.

Now, I have yet to figure out how the actual date of Easter is calculated. Since the Last Supper was a Passover Seder, Easter logically should fall during the holiday of Passover. Since Easter is pushed to a Sunday, it should be the Sunday in Passover. Frequently that happens, but not always. Then there are cases like this year where the holidays are a month apart.

Still, I think it is important to appreciate the difference amongst the religions as well as the similarities.

Be Kind To Animals

2008-03-17T21:54:00.000-07:00

One of the Jewish concepts that I like is the need to be kind to animals. There is a belief that if you own animals you are supposed to feed them before you sit down to eat yourself. Now if you own a pet or two, it is one thing but if you work on a farm or take care of animals in a barn, it is quite another.

I like the concept because it teaches that we not only have an obligation to human beings but to ALL creatures. Still, when I became a parent a number of years ago, I did not realize I would be hosting a zoo in my house. My son has a lot of stuffed animals and when I walk into his room, it feels like I am walking into a zoo.

This week, there are actually two zoos in the house. My niece is up visiting and she travels with her stuff animals. As I walked past where she is staying, it felt like I was passing another zoo as all her animals were spread out over the bed.

The truth is, stuffed animals can help to teach children about responsibility. And, since a number of my son’s stuffed animals are Webkinz, that too can help teach lessons about responsibility and caring. I realize that it can take a lot of time and can be annoying. Still, after the pets are registered, you have to go to the website to make sure they are virtually fed and virtually played with. The animals also need to be taken to the vet, looked after and they need to receive a lot of TLC.

By doing all this, the child learns about caring for others, for animals (and maybe even for people). Yes, homework comes first. Yes, my son does not need to be on the computer all the time, but when he is, I feel he learns some good values from this website, and some good values that, while the people who run the website may not know, tie into Judaism.

The Stranger Among Us

2008-03-16T20:18:00.000-07:00

Every Saturday in Shul, towards the end of services, the Rabbi starts his announcements by saying, “if you are a member here and you see someone you don’t recognize, introduce yourself. “

I think this is a nice touch. I know when my father (Z’’L) came to visit, he often commented that he felt the shul I went to was very cold as no one would come up and wish him “Good Shabbos”. This was before the new Rabbi was there. I confess, I tend to be a shy individual and prefer sticking with my friends. When it comes to faces, if it is someone I don’t know, I am not particularly great remembering them and if I have seen them before. Still, I try. I know what a difference it can make.

I have always tried to make it a point that when I work somewhere, if someone new starts, I try to go up to him or her, introduce myself and say, “welcome”. Again, I am not the most comfortable doing this but I know it means a lot to people.

When I left a job to go back to school, the people I worked with came up to say goodbye and wish me well (not surprisingly). One person told me how he remembered how I was the first one to come up to him and welcome him and how that made him feel at home. I did not even remember this. I know, however, whenever I have started a new job, it is often times difficult and appreciated when people come up to me.

I recall another instance where I was at a meeting and I introduced myself to a guest and talked to this person. A couple of years later that person came to a meeting again. He found me. I did not even recall this individual. Still, he remembered me and told me how grateful he was that I cam over and introduced myself and explained some things that were happening during the meeting.

So, if we do it at work, at meeting places, school, etc., then certainly it makes sense to go up to people we do not recognize at shul and welcome them and introduce ourselves. The camaraderie aspect is important. Often times people of larger synagogues tend to forget this. New people and visitors stick out at smaller synagogues. Still, one way to keep a larger shul healthy, vibrant and remaining large, is to welcome new people.

The Rabbi is right and we should remember to always try and introduce ourselves to the stranger in our midst.

A Snow Day

2008-03-14T12:42:00.000-07:00

Last Sunday, I got the day off from teaching in the computer lab. I enjoyed having a day off from Religious School. Even though I enjoy working there, it was nice to have a day off. What was even nicer was, the call was made Saturday night. As a result, I got a call in the evening that I did not need to be in come the next morning.

As it turned out, I had been falling behind on getting my lesson plans together. I knew what the instructor who was bringing his kids to the lab wanted me to cover, but I just had not had a chance to search the web, find my links, and have everything put together. As luck would have it, just as I sat down at the computer to work on this was when the call came in. Not only did I get a day off, because I had procrastinated (or honestly, just been so busy), I did not even have to put anytime into working on a lesson that ultimately would never be used anyway.

Now, I am feeling a little guilty. This week, once again, has been hectic. It will probably be Saturday night when I sit down to my computer to get my lesson plan together. Once again, my day jobs have just been piling up work and I have been taking a lot of it home. It feels like I am just barely getting it done on time, but I am getting it done!

I know this Sunday we will not be having another storm. I will be showing up to the synagogue’s computer lab and I will need to have a lesson plan ready to go. It looks like once again, it will be waiting until the last minute.

Fortunately I have a number of effective websites in my files and the kids seem to enjoy them. Still, I hope to stop this last minute stuff and be able to spend some more time getting everything together.

Three Torahs

2008-03-11T12:29:00.001-07:00

Like many other people, I enjoy watching rare events. I remember, as a child, being able to stay up late, or get up early, to see certain eclipses, because they were so rare. Then something rare in sports happens, it is a thrill to watch because you know you won’t see it every day.

I like to see that same excitement transferred to religion, to Judaism. Periodically, throughout the year, we read from two different Torahs (two different scrolls that contain the written laws, the Five Books of Moses). Reading from three Torahs, however, is truly uncommon.

We read from three Torahs on Simchat Torah as we read the last portion of the fifth book from one Torah, the first portion from the first book from the next Torah and a special Maftir, special additional reading (which usually is just repeating the last part of what is read). This is the only time during the year when it is guaranteed you will be reading from three Torahs. The other times may or may not happen during the year.

If, for instance, Shabbat Channukah happens to also be Rosh Hodesh, the beginning of the new month, we read from three Torahs. You read one Torah for Shabbat, one for Channukah and one for Rosh Hodesh. You also read three Torahs when it is Shabbat, Rosh Hodesh and Parchat HaHodesh (the first Shabbat in the month of Nissan).

We also read from three Torahs, as we did this past Shabbat, if it is Shabbat, Rosh Hodesh and Shabbat Sh’kalim (the first of four special Shabbats that take place before Passover). By the way it is impossible for three Torahs to be read on Shabbat Sh’Kalim and Shabbat HaHodesh of the same year and it is possible that none of the three events happen in a year.

My son, whose age is still in single digits, is fascinated when we read three Torahs and specifically looks forward to it. I think that is the kind of excitement we want to instill in our youngsters. Make them excited about coming to services.

Meanings

2008-03-07T14:01:00.001-08:00

It is fascinating to find out what is on the minds of fifth and sixth graders. During the week I do some tutoring over at a religious institution This past week, I was with fifth and sixth graders. One of the assignments they had to do was to work in groups, pick a prayer and talk about the meaning of that prayer. For this assignment, it was not to actually talking about the meaning of the prayer but rather what the prayer meant to them.

Some of the students just were not into the type of assignment. Many of them, however, were interested and excited. Some of the students were poetic in there presentation. Some of them had some deep philosophical understandings of the prayers.

While I believe it is important to get students to shul, often times one of the problems is they do not understand the Hebrew prayers (This can be true of many adults as well). Usually it is due to the fact that people don’t bother to look at the translation of the prayer but sometimes it can occur because the English translation is not very good.

Taking a moment to actually stop and consider what you are saying when reciting prayers is, I think, a great idea. I think it makes a lot of sense for kids and it makes a lot of sense for adults. It can helps us have a better understanding of… A Jewish Thought!

Socializing

2008-03-04T12:34:00.000-08:00

Years ago, when I moved to a new area and joined a synagogue, I became friendly with the Rabbi. As the High Holidays rolled around, the Rabbi told me I should make sure that I was sitting next to people my own age, so I would have someone to talk to.

“Rabbi,” I said, “You want that during your sermon and during the davening (praying), I should be talking instead of concentrating on the prayers”?

The Rabbi smiled and said, “Whether or not you talk, I am still going to bang on my lectern for quiet”.

The Rabbi understood the importance of socializing. Yes prayer is important, but so is making friends and talking to others. This is why the Jewish service is different from other religions; there is talking going on throughout the service. It can be distracting, but it is important.

Consider, for a moment, the number of youth groups that religious organizations have. There are social groups for older members as well, but things are provided for the members.

My synagogue has two youth groups that cover people from age 12-18. Now, they are looking at starting a pre-youth group for members younger than 12. I do not know if it will work, but I certainly understand the importance. Children of all ages must be shown that we feel they are important. They must know that showing up to religious services is not only spiritually uplifting (although they may not see that yet), but it is a social occasion to be enjoyed as well.

Roll With It

2008-03-03T01:12:00.001-08:00

Teaching in the computer lab is a lot of fun, but at times can be a little difficult. I enjoy working with the different teachers and doing different things. Coming up with websites that deal with Judaism, are age appropriate and deal with the material the teacher is covering is a challenge and a thrill.

Most of the time, it is the same teacher bringing each of three classes to the lab. The same lesson works for all three classes since the material covered from one class to the next is the same and the ages of the students are the same. For the younger kids, it can be a little trickier, however, because there are different teachers and each one only brings in one class.

Yesterday I had two kindergarten teachers and one pre-K teacher come to the lab. The kindergarten teachers decided they would like me to do something on Purim. I was able to find some fun websites, games, and videos related to the topic. The Pre-K teacher was teaching about Noah and the ark and asked for me to focus on that, which I gladly did.

The interesting part was, after the pre-K kids left, I still had that lesson plan open on the computer. The substitute, who brought the first group of Kindergarteners down asked if the Noah sites were age appropriate, since she was teaching about Noah yesterday. The second kindergarten teacher also ended up using some of those sites, as Noah and the Ark was being covered by this teacher too.

I have no objections to changing things on the fly. In the words of Steve Windwood, “Roll with it”. I truly am fine with that. It is just that it would have made things a little easier if I only had to do one lesson plan instead of three.

Oh well, at least I enjoyed looking over the website. A Jewish Thought is good for the computer teacher as well and every time I look at these sites, even if I have used them before, I learn something new.

Returning!

2008-03-02T06:07:00.001-08:00

It has been awhile since I have posted an entry. I’d like to be able to give a good excuse as to why it has been so long. Unfortunately, honestly it has just been the hecticness and craziness of life that has prevented me from posting. I am hoping to be posting on a more regular basis.

I recently finished reading an interesting book—Gilgamesh. I was reading a new translation but what makes this book so fascinating is, historically it is the oldest book that is known to the human race, predating the Bible by about 1000 years. I say historically it is the oldest because when it comes to a matter of faith, most of us (myself included) are willing to forgo certain aspects of common sense. For those who believe the Bible is G-d’s account, it will not matter that historians consider Gilgamesh to be older than the Bible.

What is fascinating about this story are some of the similarities between it and the Bible. You can actually find a number but the most obvious one is the story of a flood. The gods create a flood that destroys the entire world, accept for one man (who overhears the plot). This man, Odnapishtim, is told to build an ark and take one of every known animal on the ark.

Once that happens, it rains for seven days and nights. After the rains stop, Odnapishtim sends out a dove to try and find dry land. The dove is unsuccessful. Later, a swallow is sent out and it, too, returns. Finally a raven is sent out and it does not return.

Most of the gods are upset that they decided to create such a terrible flood; one is not. I am not quite sure why but, in order to make things right, the god who is angry grants Odnapishtim eternal life and makes him a god. I guess this way he can claim that the flood did destroy all humanity.

There are of course differences between this story and that of Noah. Still, there are a lot of similarities. If you believe that this story is older than the Bible, than it raises all sorts of news questions about the flood. If you do not, it still would suggest that we have historical knowledge about a very damaging flood.

Either way, I found the book very interesting and was fascinated by some of the similarities to the Bible (with, or course, a lot of differences).

A Great Learning Experience

2008-01-11T15:42:00.001-08:00

Last week was a positive experience. My son read Torah and did very well. He enjoyed it very much. I played the part of the proud father, but was truly very proud. After services, when son went up to the person who leads Junior Congregation (services for kids) and asked when the next time was that he could read.

The person who leads Junior Congregation is also my son’s Hebrew school teacher this year. On Sunday, the day after my son had read, she announced that the person who was supposed to read this week had called her to cancel. The teacher asked if any of her students were interested in reading on short notice.

Guess whose hand shot up? That’s right. My son, who had over six weeks to prepare what he had read previously (this was the first available date), was willing to read with less than a week’s practice.

We have been working hard. He will not be reading as much as he did last time and he probably will not be as smooth as he was last time, but that is okay. He is enjoying putting the time and effort in. This has been a great learning experience and hopefully he will continue to want to read Torah. Hopefully he will be able, if need be, to put a reading together with little time.

I was proud last week and I am sure I will be proud this week.

Kvelling

2008-01-01T20:37:00.000-08:00

My son is still a few years away from his Bar Mitzvah. Still, he will be reading Torah this coming Shabbat. In Junior Congregation, the leader offers the kids a chance to read and my son is reading this coming week and he is excited.

They do not read from the Torah. They just read a few lines (she tells the kids they can do anywhere from one to five). They are reading with vowels and not chanting it, but it does not matter. If the average kid is anything like my son, they get very excited and put time and effort in. This is a good habit to get them into.

My son has been practicing for a few weeks and he is insistent that he will be reading all five lines. I have been working with him and he has definitely been hard at work. He has done well but the past few days, it seems like it is all coming together for him. He has picked up speed and is reading with some vocal variety. He sounds good and he is enjoying reading. I, too, am enjoying working with him and hearing him read and seeing it all come together.

My son is already talking about the next time he can read. Me, I am just Kvelling!

"Who Knew Not Joseph"

2007-12-30T18:55:00.000-08:00

This past Shabbat (Sabbath) we began the second book of the Torah, the book of Shemot. This book, and sedrah starts with a new Pharaoh arising, “Who knew not Joseph”. This was actually one of my dad’s favorite quotes. Anytime there was some shul politics going on and my dad felt people were working against him he would say, “A new Pharaoh arose who knew not Joseph”.

It is an interesting quote and perhaps on the surface a very innocent one, but there is a lot here. How is it possible that a new king, a leader of all of Egypt, someone who would have been well schooled in the history of the country, could not know a person who had saved Egypt from complete and utter destruction? Would it be possible for a President of the United States to “Know not George Washington”. How about not knowing Christopher Columbus? There are some things we expect all adult citizens to know, especially those in power.

This is why some of the Biblical commentators suggest that it wasn’t Pharaoh knew not Joseph, but he chose to know not. He closed his eyes and deliberately forgot or ignored all Joseph had done so he could take advantage of the Jews living in Egypt at the time and get work done by slave labor.

In this day and age, when seemingly there is little loyalty, it is a good lesson to learn. Unfortunately the loyalty is not always there so be prepared for someone to ignore or forget all the good you have done if it is in his or her best interest to do so.

I was raised being taught the value of loyalty and being taught to be loyal. I was also raised with the knowledge that while we rely on others and all have to work together, to be prepared for people not to have the same dedication and determination to this value.

While I have been fortunate that many people have remained loyal to me, not everyone has and being taught this at an early age has helped. And, we have an example right in the Torah of what can and does happen when we ignore other people.

As we get set to start the secular new year, let us all redouble our efforts not to forget what others have done for us, not to forget the many blessings we have, some of which are a direct result of what others have done for us.

No Talking Please

2007-12-23T22:34:00.000-08:00

What kind of responsibility does a religious school have to its teachers? How do things work out when a parent, who is a large donor, sees things differently than the teacher? Where does the administration come down? These are tough questions, tough choices that have to be made.

At the religious school where I work, two students were chatting during one session. The teacher, trying to teach and having a tough time of it, separated the two students. Apparently this was a wrong move. The mother of one of the student’s came in and was furious. She started balling out the teacher in front of the other students. The parent pointed out that this wasn’t regular school, this was religious school and students, after spending a full day in regular school, should be allowed to talk.

The teacher directed the parent to talk with the administrator of the religious school. Now, I have all this information second hand, and only through one source, one side, but apparently the administrator told the teacher that certainly there is not a need to separate children at religious school.

I am not sure if the parents of this student are big donors to the shul. I am not sure exactly what was said, or even if the administrator agreed, but certainly that was what the teacher told me. Even if it was not exactly what happened, it certainly is the way the teacher perceived things to happen.

The result? The teacher left midyear. I understand the frustration on everyone involved but I do think when a teacher leaves mid-year, the ones who really suffer are the students.

Hopefully everything will work out for the best!

My Father's Yahrzeit

2007-12-20T19:11:00.000-08:00

I just needed to post today as this day marks my father’s second Yahrzeit. Every year, the anniversary of the death of loved one is noted, even in a certain sense celebrated. There is a memorial prayer that is said. It is not uncommon for someone who has yahrzeit to lead services and many people the Shabbat (Sabbath) before will read from Torah or Haftorah.

This year I read from Torah, and I read one of my father’s favorite parts, so I thought it was fitting. It is the part where Joseph is toying with his brothers and finally cannot take it anymore and reveals himself to him. They are in shock and literally fear for their lives. It is such a dramatic portion, and my father had a flair for the dramatic.

It may seem odd to celebrate the anniversary of someone’s death, but two thoughts come to mind. First is it is really a way to celebrate their life and the many lessons they taught. It is also a recognition that our loved ones continue to live in us, even after they pass away.

The second thought is based on some conversations I have had with psychologists and therapists who have told me that people often times feel sorrow and pain around the time of the anniversary of someone’s death, even if they may not be consciously aware that the death was around the time they are feeling down. It is helpful to do something to acknowledge that difficult time.

In effect, I think when this tradition was added to Judaism, it showed great foresight and wisdom. I think it helps many of us deal with the difficulties. I still have some difficult times dealing with the loss of both of my parents (my mother died in August but I find myself thinking about both of my parents around the Yahrzeit of each), but these customs make it easier.

I said it to them numerous times while they were alive, but I will say it yet again, “Mom, Dad, I love you both very much”!

Noah

2007-10-12T13:45:00.000-07:00

Well, this Shabbat we will read about Noah and the flood. This is my bar mitzvah sedrah some “I really don’t care to think about how many” many years later. I have always been fascinated by the sedrah. One thing which is commonly talked about is the meaning of Noah being a righteous man in his generation.

There are those who feel Noah was ONLY righteous in his generation and had he lived in another team, he would not have been looked upon in such a favorable light. I see things differently and agree with other commentators who feel the words “in his generation” emphasize that even during such a terrible time, with no positive influences around, Noah still was righteous.

What I like most about Noah is, he takes care of his family. He may not argue or bargain with G-d; he may not try to save the world, but he does make sure to have his family on the ark with him, so that they too remain safe.

The book of Genesis, of Breishet, is filled with many stories about sibling rivalry, about parents and children not treating each other fairly, trickery, bribery, all sorts of thing. I actually find it refreshing to read about a man who puts family first.

I think there is an important lesson here. Before we go out to save the world, we have to take care of ourselves and our families. It is also important to focus on the importance one generation has of helping another generation. If there is no Noah, then no one after him comes along since the entire world is destroyed. Noah, by saving himself and his family, literally did save the entire world.

To me, that is the lesson of Noah, that is the greatness of Noah, that is what should be taken out of this week’s Torah reading.

Cain And Abel

2007-10-07T21:42:00.000-07:00

The string of Jewish Holidays are over. As much as I enjoy them, I am certainly glad to be able to get back to the regular routine and have the Holidays come to an end. The last in this string marks the Jews finishing the book of Deuteronomy, the fifth and final book of the Torah, of the Five Books of Moses. We then go back to the book of Genesis and start all over again. This week we read the first portion. One of my favorite parts of this is the story of Cain and Abel. My take may be a little different and I cannot guarantee that you will not be stricken by lightening, so read at your own risk.

The story starts off with Cain bringing an offering to G-d. G-d has not asked for one but Cain decides to do it and G-d is gracious, although not overly thrilled. Seeing this, Abel decides to bring an offering to G-d as well, an offering that G-d likes and G-d, in effect says to Cain, now this is an offering more to my liking.

Let’s examine this from the point of view of a parent and two siblings. The first one remembers the parent’s birthday and brings a gift. The parent says thank you. Only after seeing the older child bring a gift does the younger child remember the birthday. The younger child goes out and buys a different gift and gives it to the parent. Upon opening it, the parent says, “This is exactly what I wanted,” and then, turning to the older child says, “Why couldn’t your gift be more like your sibling’s. That is really what I want”.

Is it any surprise that Cain resents Abel? In fact, it is G-d who creates the very conflict. Of course Cain needs to take responsibility for his own actions. Of course Abel is still dead. Still, G-d helped to create the tension.

To me, this story serves as a reminder. In effect, G-d is telling us not to play favorites with our children, not to pit one against the other. G-d shows us, when taken to the extreme, what the parents are capable of creating, on the negative side, when it comes to children. Hopefully, we as parents have learned that lesson and appreciate each child, each person, each member of society, for his or her own contributions and individuality.

Having Faith

2007-10-02T20:41:00.000-07:00

I am currently listening to a very interesting lecture on CD. The lecture is about comparative religion. I am fascinated by it. It talks about various religions, including some that pre-date Judaism, and talks about similarities and differences.

I have often wondered if this, coupled with yesterday’s post makes me appear like a skeptic or non-believer. I do not fall into either category. I do have my differences and I am willing to talk about the problems I have with certain stories. Still, we can learn from them.

I think back to a class I had in college called Religion, Myth and Magic. The instructor was talking about Bishop Codrington. Codrington, a Bishop in the Catholic Church, was also considered one of the most scholarly of anthropologists. One of Codrington’s disciples one asked him how, considering all he knew, he could still be a Bishop, a man who had faith in G-d. Codrington replied to the effect, “It is precisely because of what I do know that I can believe this way.”

In other words, Codrington was suggested that the true test of his faith was to believe, even when all the evidence, evidence that he was helping to find, pointed elsewhere. I understand that approach. From a Jewish perspective, can there be faith without doubt?

What is faith? I think Dan Brown, in the DaVinci Code, does an excellent job explaining it. To paraphrase, he is saying that faith is to believe in something regardless of what the evidence shows. Therefore, anyone who believe in something, often times will continue to believe even if the evidence says otherwise.

To that extent, at least to a degree, I understand and agree. Despite having issues, despite speaking publically, despite not automatically accepting what all the commentators say, I still have faith, I still believe. I think that is extremely important.

Starting Over

2007-10-02T01:01:00.001-07:00

With all the Jewish Holidays, it has been crazy and I have not been able to do much writing. This coming Wednesday night thru Friday marks the end of this season of Holidays. It is a fun Holiday, but it is exhausting having so many different holidays in a row, taking the time off from work, making sure things are set ahead of time, etc. Unfortunately, I feel more of a relief when they are over than a feeling of sadness, sorry to see them go. Still, it is a fun Holiday and with the end of this Holiday, we will begin the book of Bresheit, Genesis all over again.

There are so many interesting things that happen in that book that I will not be at a shortage of things to discuss. There are times where I find myself getting frustrated with the traditional commentaries, although often times I do find lessons in them. Still, I think they often do too much to explain everything. What they tell us for one instance to make things fit, they say the exact opposite of in another instance.

As an example, when Abraham passes Sarah off as his sister because he fears for his life (I will have a lot more to say about that in future posts), we are told, through the commentary, that you do not wait on, or assume, a miracle from G-d, it is important to take matters into your own hands. Later on, when Joseph is in jail in Egypt and does that, tells the servant who is set free (and whose dream he successfully interrupts), to tell Pharaoh about him, the servant forgets and it is two years later before he remembers. The commentary says this is Joseph’s punishment for not having faith in G-d, and seeking the help of a mere mortal to get him out. But, for Abraham, this was a good thing. Still, I find this all fascinating.

I do have to confess, I am often surprised I have not been struck down by lighting for my next thought, and something I have occasionally talked about. If you look at the entire book of Genesis, forget the commentary, just look at the text, I think the character that comes out looking “the worst”, or at least pretty bad, is The Almighty himself. I will have thoughts on that to.

All this being said, I still find it important, I still believe and I still go to Shul. I just find some of my own lessons as well and I enjoy some of the inconsistencies that are there, or that those who are on a higher level than I would say, “appear to be there”.

I love the fact that on Simchat Torah, as soon as we finish reading the end of the last book, the book of Deuteronomy , we go right back and start the book of Genesis all over again. We are anxious to begin anew, we are anxious to find a new understanding of things we have read numerous times. I think that is a wonderful lesson to follow for life, no matter how many times you do something, you can always gain a new understanding, insight and approach to doing it again. I look forward to once again going through my favorite book of the five books of the Torah (I am not alone there) and seeing what new insights I gain.

Sukkot

2007-09-26T14:23:00.001-07:00

The Holiday of Sukkot starts tonight. It is the only holiday where we are commanded to be happy. That in and of itself is very interesting. We have just come through the holiday of Yom Kippur where we are being judged and that is not an easy thing. So, in one sense it almost seems like this is the reward.

Still, if you look at the customs affiliated with Hoshanah Rabbah, the sixth day of this seven day holiday, there are still clearly signs involved that deal with the season of repentance. It has led some to believe that at one point that was actually more the day when our fate was finally sealed, not Yom Kippur.

Either way, today the holiday is celebrated with a lot of fun and enjoyment. One of the symbols associated with the holiday is the Etrog (a citrus fruit) and a lulav (branches from three different types of trees). There are lots of explanations as to what each one means and why they are combined and I am not going to get into that here.

Traditionally each person is supposed to have his or her own etrog and lulav. The way we get around that is you can ‘borrow’ from someone else but you explicitly tell them that you are not loaning it to them but actually giving it to them (so they own it) but only with the understanding that they will return it to you after they are finished making the blessing and shaking it.

I have at times purchased an etrog and lulav set but other times I have ‘borrowed’ it from someone else. This year, after buying a house and feeling quite poor, I figured I would not purchase my own. It was my son, however, who indicated that he would really like to have one this year. When you have a nine year old that enjoys the meaning and symbolism of the holiday, that enjoys participating in the services and going to shul (synagogue) on the important, but lesser known holidays, what can you do? I purchased my own etrog and lulav set and I am thrilled to have them and to be sharing them with my son.

I wish you a Hag Samach, Happy Holidays.

From This Yom Kippur To Next

2007-09-24T21:14:00.001-07:00

As I reflect on the holiday of Yom Kippur, I find that the very beginning of the Kol Nidre service, the evening service that starts the holiday, truly speaks to me. The service starts out by saying that we deem it appropriate, by the heavenly tribunal, to pray with sinners.

Right from the get-go, I relate. We often hear the misery loves company. Well, this is not misery, but we are saying that we are all in the same boat, that we all have sinned and can do better. I find that this sets the tone for me and I truly enjoy that.

From there, we go into the actual Kol Nidre (All Vows). This to speaks to me. There is a line in here that the Rabbis debated on for years, but it is in the prayer and has been for centuries. We ask G-d to absolve us of any vows we make from this Yom Kippur Holiday until next Yom Kippur. It would make sense to ask for forgiveness and to be absolved from last Yom Kippur to this Yom Kippur. In fact that was what a number of Rabbis felt should be.

For me, however, to word it this way speaks volumes. It says we will try to do better than we did last year. We really believe we can (and we probably do). Still, we realize we are human. We are going to make vows that we will be unable to keep. We are going to do things that will upset people. We know we are not perfect and over the upcoming year, we will make mistakes.

Then we ask G-d to please forgive us ahead of time for those times when our intentions were good, our motives were pure and yet we just failed. While some of the Rabbis may have preferred the language that says from last Yom Kippur to this one, for me the idea of from this one to the next Yom Kippur really works. It sets the tone, for me, as to what I feel this whole holiday is supposed to be about.

The Reform Way

2007-09-22T20:02:00.001-07:00

Well, the Yom Kippur holiday is over. The fast is behind us and we begin the task of facing another year. There are so many parts of the service that speak to me and I will blog on them in upcoming days. Of course, we really aren’t given many days to reflect on the liturgy as the holiday of Sukkot starts in four nights, and we will all be focusing on the joyous time of that season.

Today, however, I am thinking about how Reform Judaism often has it “Right”. My wife, who works overnights, often takes the night after a fast off from work because it is so exhausting. So, if she worked Saturday night, she would have taken tonight off.

Of course, the following day we usually return to work and get back into the swing of things but often times we are still mentally and physically exhausted the next day. I teach at a Reform religious school. By son goes to a conservative religious school (through the shul, the synagogue, where we are members). My son has school tomorrow.

The Reform school where I teach understands how tired and exhausted we are. We have the day off. I am very grateful. While we all were required to submit lesson plans in advance for the first three weeks of school, often times we teachers are still putting the finishing touches on the plan on Saturday night. I do not have to worry about that, I have the day off.

I was talking to my sister this evening and she teaches at a religious school at the other end of the state. She does have school tomorrow. She told me she is so exhausted she plans on waking up early tomorrow to do the lesson. I would probably end up doing that as well if I were in her shoes, but again, I am glad I do not have to.

Also, my son attends Hebrew school on Sundays and Tuesdays. Some students attend Wednesday instead of Tuesday, but everyone goes on Sunday. Since the Jewish Holidays this year start on Wednesday night, the Wednesday session will not be meeting for the next few weeks, but the Tuesday session will.

At the reform shul where I teach, they are not even starting the weekday sessions until all the Holidays are over. This way Tuesday and Wednesday classes are on the same schedule, covering the same material each week. This makes a lot of sense to me.

Sometimes the Conservative and Orthodox circles can learn by watching and listening to the Reform, rather than just dismissing this as something lesser than what they are.

A Special Flavor

2007-09-21T10:07:00.001-07:00

As we get set to start the Holiday of Yo0m Kippur this evening, I think back to conversations I have had with friends over the years. While many disagree with me, I truly feel that Yom Kippur has a special feel, a special flavor about it and just like the rest of the Jewish Holiday, it is enjoyable.

Yes, the Holiday has it challenges. Yes, it is hard to refrain from all the things you are supposed to on Yom Kippur. Still, there is a good feeling, at least for me there is, about doing it, being able to do it, wanting to do it.

Some of my friends have said what they like about the Holiday is they get to catch up with other synagogue people they have not seen since last year at this time. That is not what does it for me. If you can get yourself in the proper frame of mind ( and that can me more easily said than done) the awesomeness, the awe inspiring message of the day is very powerful.

In fact, in times gone by, many people did not view this as a sad day. If you take a look at what we do on this day, it is not viewed as a sad day (that is reserved for Tisha B’Av). For instance, we say a Scheheh’he’anu on this day. On days of mourning, on sad days on the Jewish Calendar, that prayer is not said.

On this Holiday, there truly is a feeling that we will be given for our sins, that we get a chance to start all over again, and that G-d wants us to return from our ways of the past year that are less than perfect. As the liturgy says, “like a parent (father) has compassion upon his children, please have compassion on us”. It is a very powerful idea. Forgiveness is a wonderful concept, so is the idea of being able to start with a clean slate.

Once again, I wish everyone the best for the New Year. May we all be signed and sealed for a year of health, happiness, blessing and goodness, and may we all be able to help others experience those same feelings over the New Year.

Yom Kippur Fasting

2007-09-20T19:33:00.001-07:00

For the past umpteen years, like many Jews the world over, I have fasted on Yom Kippur. I first started fasting when I was 12. While the tradition does not require a full fast of someone until 13, I wanted to prove to myself the year before I HAD to fast, that I COULD fast.

The fast is a full 25 hour fast with nothing to eat or drink. Many of my non-Jewish friends and acquaintances are always amazed to hear that the fast also means no water. While some fasts are easier than others, I really do not have a problem with fasting.

Judaism does, of course, recognize the importance of those who need to eat. If there are medical issues and reason, you do not fast, you take your medicine, you do what you need to do. Again, this all makes sense.

I confess, however, this year for the first time in years, I am nervous going into the fast. Over the past number of months, I think I have developed an anxiety issue. I recently got a medication from the doctor to help me deal with this. The prescription is PRN, that I should take it as needed. The truth is, for such a medicine, one that is not crucial to my survival, one that I could do without (otherwise it would not be PRN), I really should avoid taking it. Still, there is a part of me concerned about suffering some kind of anxiety attack during the Holiday, or at least feeling the discomforts I often get when the anxiety approaches.

So, It is not crucial, but it certainly is helpful to take this medicine. I will probably take it tomorrow night, right before the fast starts and pray for the best (I certainly be in the right place for that).

Once again, I wish everyone a G’Mar Hatima Tovah, that you should be inscribed and sealed for a good year.

On Rosh Hashanah It Is Written ...

2007-09-18T20:45:00.001-07:00

As I sat in Shul over the Jewish New Year, the Holiday of Rosh Hashanah, I found that one part of the liturgy hit me, really spoke to me. I confess that it is the same prayer every year that speaks to me (although perhaps a little more now that both of my parents have passed away).

We say that “On Rosh Hashanah it is written and that on Yom Kippur it is sealed”. We then continue on by asking how many shall be born and how many shall die, who by water and who by fire, etc. It is a powerful concept to think that our fate is sealed on Yom Kippur.

The prayer ends, however, with the notion that three things can set aside an evil decree, a bad judgment. They are: Repentance; Prayer: Charity. This concept is even more powerful. It actually means, at least my interpretation is, we have the power to override G-d’s decisions. G-d can seal our fate on Yom Kippur, but even after the holiday is over, if someone engages in true repentance, is true prayer and in acts of charity and or loving kindness, G-d can set aside the evil decree.

Obviously no one gets out of this life alive, so at some point you do not have an evil decree turned away. Of course, there are times when, as painful as it is to those who survive, death can be a blessing. Seeing a person stricken with a serious disease, living in pain, perhaps it is a blessing when they pass away. So even a decree of death does not have to be a bad judgment.

Still, it is my wish that all of you have a good, healthy year. I wish you all a Shannah Tovah O’Metocah (A good, sweet year), and as we approach the holiday of Yom Kippur, a G’Mar Hatima Tovah (that you should be sealed for a good year).

The Young Ones!

2007-09-17T21:02:00.000-07:00

So, the year teaching at the religious school, in the computer lab, has started well. The first session of the year involved bring in the youngest students (3 and 4 year olds) and then the two first grade class.

Working with the young one can be a lot of fun. Okay, so when it comes to putting the lessons together, I know at class time, I will not be able to give them War and Peace, or get them involved in a great discussion. Still, they tend to be very appreciative of the efforts that you put in. I have had a number of young students come up to me and hug me as they are getting set to leave the lab, because they had such a good time.

I have also found sites that work for them. On-line coloring is always very good. So are jigsaw puzzles. Normally I would not recommend this for young children, but you can change the cut on the computer to as little as four pieces (which often they can handle) as well as having an auto solve button on the computer.

Apparently the teacher who handled this grade last year must have liked my style, and working with me. She has signed up a number of times for the computer, I believe 4 times over the course of the year. This may be the most amount of times a teacher is bringing his/her class into the lab. Hopefully I will prove this teacher’s trust in my correct and she will be glad at the end of the year that she signed up for some many sessions.

Hebrew By Holidays

2007-09-16T21:01:00.000-07:00

Today I was back teaching at the religious school. Getting back into the swing of things after the holiday is not easy and I will have to do it three more times with the rest of the slew of holidays coming up. Still, teaching in the computer lab, doing this the kids enjoy and enjoy the things myself, makes it easier.

The teacher who brought her kids in today teaches Hebrew. In talking with her ahead of time, I knew she wanted me to find things for the kids to do on the computer that focused on the current Jewish Holidays and taught words associated with them. Of course, I can get some leeway, which makes things easier.

For instance, I found a site that has Hebrew matching, like the old concentration game. The cards have the words written in English and Hebrew and the computer also says the name of the object (you can set it for Hebrew or English). I had the students set it for Hebrew so they could hear the words being said. While one of the categories was not Rosh Hashanah, or any other specific holiday, I stretched a little. One of the categories is nature. Since nature play a major role in some of the holidays, and especially in the upcoming holiday of Sukkot, I allowed them to use this one. There is also a category for fruits and it is customary to eat a new fruit on the holiday of Rosh Hashanah, so I let them use this one.

It is always easier when the teacher is flexible as well. In fact, a few of the sites we went to had a number of games. Some were not related to Hebrew, but were related to Judaism, such as playing hangman with words from various Jewish Holidays. When the teacher does not object, and today’s did not, after I have them look at the things I specifically wanted to cover, the can play some games as well. Of course, I do monitor closely to make sure it is all appropriate. So, today was a fun day getting back into the routine.

Joy And Nachus

2007-09-15T19:02:00.000-07:00

I am one of these people who enjoys being in shul (synagogue) on Rosh Hashanah. I enjoy the davening (praying). I like the melodies, I like the liturgy, I like seeing people I have not seen there in a long time (probably since last year around this time).

It was such a thrill for me to go to shul with my son, whose age has not yet reached double digits. People turn around and look at him, the listen to him daven and hear him sing the melodies. It is not uncommon for people to ask him if he is enrolled in the local yeshiva (he is not. He’s good, but not at that level. Still Judaism means a lot to him).

On the first day of the holiday, we got there towards the end of Torah reading. It is a long day and while I would enjoy being there for longer, he will not hold up. Still, from the point we got there, he only briefly stepped out once to use the restroom. He stayed in for the sermon and all the appeals, and of course, all the davening. It is a Conservative Synagogue we attend and the Hazzan, the cantor (who leads the singing of the prayers) mixes in traditional Rosh Hashanah melodies with some of his regular Shabbat (Sabbath) morning tunes. There is my son, following along. There are the other congregants sitting around us, looking at him admiringly.

It is a good feel in general, but for me, it is also vindication. I have been bringing my son to services pretty much every Saturday morning (and holiday morning) since he was about one month old. He would, at times run around the shul. He would, at times (when he was younger), make baby noises. He could even at times be disruptive and that was when I would take him out (but simply because he is making happy sounds, or talking quietly to other people, I would let him stay. After all, many adults can do similar things).

While congregants always admired the fact that he was pretty much a regular on Shabbat morning, some also resented him. It was a change from the old guard who insisted on absolute quiet in the shul. Even as that started to change (and really did significantly change from before I lived in the area and before my son was born). People did not always like the fact that a child was making noise.

I still remember one time when the Hazzan was on vacation and one of the lay members of the congregation was leading services. My son was playing quietly with a friend of his, same age, in the back of the synagogue. Word was sent back to me and the parent of my son’s playmate, that since he wanted to be able to concentrate on leading the service, we were to take them out. I was not happy.

Now, I see that my insistence about bringing him has paid off. There were times I wondered if I should continue or if he actually got anything out of it because often times he was being noisy and we were out for most of the service.

Obviously, this has paid off. Of course, the child(ren) need to see Judaism practiced in the home as well; it has to be reinforced. Still, I am thrilled with the way this all turned out and it is quite a change from High Holidays gone by. I remember the first such service he was at. He cooed at one point and the people in front of my wife, my son and me, turned around and asked if he was going to be doing that the whole service?

Well, it is important to start teaching, and even programming at an early age. Doing that leads to the feelings of joy and nachus I experienced earlier this week.

To one and all, Shanah Tovah (A good year) and a G’mar Hatima Tovah (May you be inscribed and sealed for a good year).

Good Versus Happy

2007-09-12T14:43:00.001-07:00

With the holiday of Rosh Hashanah starting tonight, I just want to take a moment to wish everyone a good new year. I one time conducted an interview (in a previous life) and spoke with the person about the holiday. The Rabbi explained that we do not say Happy New Year because we know that a year will have its ups and downs. Therefore the hope is that everyone have a good year, that when it is all said and done and you reflect back on the year, the year will have been good.

I liked that insight and understanding and I need to run to help get set up for the Holidays, so once again, I will simply wish everybody a good new year.

Remembering 9-11

2007-09-11T13:58:00.000-07:00

It is not easy to experience the day, September 11, and not think back to six years ago. Do you remember where you were or what you were doing relatively early that morning when you heard about the first crash, the plane hitting one of the twin towers? How about when another plane his the second tower? When the Pentagon was hit? When the plane was taken down by the passengers in Pennsylvania?

I remember picking my son up from daycare that afternoon. He was way too young to understand anything about the events. I didn’t even try to explain it or talk to him about it. I just made sure to give him lots of hugs and kisses that day.

Now, six years later, my son was asking questions. Now, six years later, I have tried to explain some of the events of that day to him, on his level.

I am guessing that every American citizen who lived through the tragedy of that day thinks back to it today. Certainly those people who lost a loved one, who were in the vicinity of any of the crashes must think about it. I am sre that many people from many different cultures think about it, and probably most recall it as the solemn day it was as opposed to those few sick individuals who view it as a joyous event.

As a Jewish American, this tragedy hurts even more, in the sense that Al Quaida claimed that this was in part an attack because of the United State’s relationship with Israel and their support of Judaism. While the U.S. has its faults, we tend to being accepting of everyone and enjoy the fact that so many different cultures come together and live together, peaceful and actually enjoy watching and learning about each other’s cultures. That is a lesson that Al Quaida really needs to learn. I doubt they will, but I hope so.

One side note: I think it is unfortunate that there are still some people who do not draw a distinction between the Moslem world, most of whom are respectful individual and enjoy experiencing their customs, laws and traditions, (as well as watching others enjoy different customs) and the extremist like Al Quaida who feel violence and destruction is the only way to get a message across. We all need to be tolerant of one another!

A Nice Ritual

2007-09-10T12:37:00.000-07:00

My son had his first day of religious instruction yesterday, well, first day for the new school year. He enjoyed it and I had a number of teachers come up to me and tell me how smart he is and how much he likes to participate (Yes, I’m bragging). But, what impressed me most is what the religious school did after the session was over (and they have done this for the last number of years).

The Men’s club sponsors a picnic for the end of the first day of school. The grill hotdogs and hamburgers, as well as veggie burgers. They have drinks and snack to go along with the picnic food and they have games as well. The bring some of the “bouncy” type equipment that you can rent and the kids climb in and start bouncing all over the place. The picnic is mainly for the school children and their families but it is open to anyone who want to pay the nominal fee.

I have heard of schools where on the first day of school they give the kids something sweet and tell them they hope the rest of the year, and all their learning experiences are just as sweet, kind of like dipping an apple in honey on the New Year, but this is something I have not seen other schools do. I think it is great to provide such a fun environment for the kids on the first day of religious school and I look forward to enjoying this ritual for the next few years to come.

The Two Angels

2007-09-07T10:08:00.000-07:00

As most of you know by now, because I have mentioned it about a million bajillion times (phrase borrowed from the Junie B Jones series of books and a thank you to the author, Barbara Parks for coining the phrase), this weekend I will be moving into my new house, my first house since being married, as it is time to get out of the apartments—yeah! Since we are getting things set up, the plan is to have Shabbos dinner there tonight.

The house is not yet set up. The only furniture currently there is the folding stuff, but it will do just fine. We will be doing a Hannukah Habayit ceremony (Dedication of the house), but that won’t be done until we are officially in. Still, there is something very exciting about knowing this is the first Shabbat (Sabbath) in the new home.

The excitement level is very high. Honestly (and fortunately) it is not as high as it was the first Shabbat that I got to bless my son after he was born. That probably was the most meaningful Shabbat that I have ever had, certainly in a long time. Certainly other milestones come to mind as well, in terms of being meaningful (not all positive thought, for instance, the Shabbat celebrated during the Shivah period after my mother died, as well as the one during Shivah after my father died were very meaningful). Still, this one does rank up there as one of the most meaningful.

Many of you know, I am sure, the story about the two Angels that visit each house Friday Night and look around. If it is a welcoming Shabbat atmosphere, the good Angel says, “May it be like this every Shabbat,” and the second Angel, the bas angel, has to say “Amen” (Let it be so). If the house is in dissaray, shambles and there is not much of a Shabbos atmosphere, the bad angel says, “May it be like this every Shabbat,” and the good angel has to answer “Amen”.

I can’t tell you the house won’t be in disarray as we are in the process of moving. I can, however, say that there will definitely be a warm, welcoming, loving Shabbat atmosphere and hopefully that atmosphere will be in the house for many more Shabbats to come.

Overlooking Faults

2007-09-06T14:19:00.000-07:00

I remember as a teenager going to shul with my father. He one time made a comment about one of my Hebrew school classmates. I was quick to defend this individual. Later on, he made a comment about someone else in the class and I did not defend him. My dad (who not only was the Rabbi but also ran the Religious School since it was a small synagogue) asked my why I was quick to defend one of my classmates but not the other. Without hesitation I simply said, “Because he’s my friend” of the one I was defending. My dad always loved that answer and the honesty of how we are quick to defend friend and look past their faults because they are our friends.

This past Saturday, there was a Bat Mitzvah in shul. My wife made a comment about one of the males in the synagogue who was not wearing a head covering (Kippah, Yarmulke, skull cap, take your pick). The truth is, I do not even notice these things. I do not concentrate on what others are doing, or are not doing at shul, I try to focus on myself. My wife (seemingly) can notice all of the things people should be doing differently there).

Once my wife brought this to my attention, I found myself looking around the synagogue, at the different people. One thing I noticed was the length of the skirt of the Bat Mitzvah. It certainly was not obscene but it did seem a little short to me. I asked my wife what she thought.

My wife knows the mother of the Bat Mitzvah. She has served on committees with her at the Hebrew school. Although I do not think of them as friends, they are clearly very friendly towards one another. When I asked my wife about the length of the skirt, my wife told me it was fine, she did not see a problem.

I found myself thinking back to the comment I made to my father. We are quick to overlook the shortcomings of those with whom we are friendly, with those of whom we want to overlook the shortcomings. With others, we are not quite so forgiving.

Random Rosh Hashanah Thoughts

2007-09-04T18:37:00.000-07:00

The Jewish New Year, Rosh Hashanah, is just around the corner. I have always found this holiday to be unique and interesting and in a very real sense even a little puzzling. One the one hand, this is a festive event. While it certainly is not celebrated in the manner of our secular New Year, it is a joyous time, it is celebrated with a festive meal. They say that Rosh Hashanah, by its very name (translates to “Head of the Year”) is the day that sets the tone for the entire year. As a result, it is not meant to be a solemn day.

Rosh Hashanah also, however, begins the “Yamin Naraim” (The days of awe) and it is the start of “Azeret Y’mei T’Shuvah” (The Ten Days of Repentance). As a result, it takes on the feel, to a lesser degree, of the most solemn day of the year, Yom Kippur, which occurs ten days later. We are told that on Rosh Hashanah, G-d decides the fate for each person and on Yom Kippur, the fate is sealed.

Even this concept seems a little foreign and strange. If your fate is sealed for the year then you do not have to worry about what you do for the rest of the year, except for the consequences it will have in the subsequent year. The truth is this concept never had much appeal to me.

There are two concepts that I do specifically like, however. First is the notion that you should apologize to people if you hurt them, even if you did not mean to, even if you are not aware of the fact you did. I find it very powerful talking to people during this time of year and asking for forgiveness for anything I might have done that hurt them.

The second concept has to do with the Kol Nidre liturgy, the evening service that begins the holiday. In the Kol Nidre prayer, we ask that G-d forgive us for any vows we have made but not kept, from this Yom Kippur until next Yom Kippur. Of course it would make more sense to say from last Yom Kippur to this Yom Kippur. There is a recognition that we will make vows and promises, with the best of intentions but we know we are not perfect and will not keep them all. So, we ask ahead of time for G-d to forgive us of any vows we will make over the course of the upcoming year.

To me, these are two of the most powerful ideas exhibited during this season.

To one and all, L’Shanah Tovah (A Good Year).

More Thoughts On Prayer

2007-09-03T17:57:00.000-07:00

Yesterday’s post got me thinking about the power of prayer. My mother was one of these people who felt everything had to be in black and white. If you could not explain it, if you could not show it, then she did not put much weight in it.

A couple of years before she passed away she was working with my oldest nephew, who was in yeshiva. The paper was about the healing power of prayer. What studies showed was when someone was not feeling well, if another person prayed for the sick individual, even if the sick person did not know there was someone praying for him or her, there was a better chance of a full recovery. At the end of the project my mother said, “You know, maybe there is something to this”.

Do not get the wrong idea. I grew up in a house that enjoyed the traditions of Judaism. I grew up in a house where there was prayer and where going to shul was part of the weekly ritual (with a father who was a reform Rabbi, that certainly is not surprising). Still, is it not fair to wonder if G-d listen more, or cares more about a person who prays. Will G-d ignore the individual who does not pray.

All I know is that by praying, it made me feel like I could do something, maybe even in some small way have some destiny over the outcome. I do go to shul on a regular basis but it is interesting how the thoughts change when you are praying if you feel you are faced with a serious situation.

Fortunately it was not a serious situation and everything turned out well. Still, I guess we should never underestimate the power of prayer.

The Power Of Prayer

2007-09-02T01:14:00.001-07:00

Yesterday afternoon I had a bit of a scare. After I got back from Shul I started packing some books and other items in our apartment into boxes. At one point it felt like I may have pulled, tore or broke a muscle (in the area of my upper left arm). I went to get checked out at the hospital and they decided, while they did not think it was heart related, they should do an EKG to make sure.

When they finished the EKG the technician said, ”I don’t like they way that looks”.

I asked if she meant she did not like the way it printed out, or if she did not like what it said and she told me she did not like what it said and seemed (at least in my mind) to hightail it back to the doctor.

They came to get me for a second EKG a little while later. This time they shaved a little chest hair out of the way because they thought that might help them get an accurate reading (as the thinking was maybe the last one was not accurate). When it finished the technician said something like, “This one looks better”. Still, the look on her face, the fact that the seemed to keep me hooked up to the machine for a longer period of time (like they might me trying to get additional information) and the fact that they announced the bed where they were moving me, before I was even unhooked from the machine (usually it takes a while before they get you to a bed), all had me concerned.

It was over an hour and a half before someone came to see me. During this time I felt every possible symptom one could feel. Once I thought they thought something was wrong, the mind was able to conjure up all sorts of pain.

It is amazing how as I sat there I found myself praying. English prayers, any Hebrew prayers I knew by heart, any prayers I could think of. It made me feel better. So, I got to wondering, is G-d really quicker to help, or does G-D really care more about those people who pray? Did I have a better chance at survival because I was praying? I really do not think so but I do know it helped to calm me down and make me feel better.

As it turned out, it was just a false reading on the EKG and the second one truly was better and showed everything to be fine. Just hearing that calmed me down. The chest X-rays showed no damage and everything looked fine. I was sent home and told to take it easy over the next two to three days, so that is just what I will do.

A Jacket

2007-08-30T14:05:00.001-07:00

The story is told of my grandfather (and it is a true story) that when he was a young teenage boy, he had a fight with his parents and left to be on his own. He found himself a job and earned some money. Every week he would buy himself a herring and a loaf of bread. That hearing and bread lasted him for all his meals for the week. The rest of the money he saved up.

When it was getting close to Passover, my Zeide went and bought himself the fanciest suit he could find. He then went to his parents for the Passover Seder and showed off his new suit. “Look how well I am doing,” was his comment to his father.

Suits are so much a part of significant religious events. My son for a long period of time would not wear a jacket or tie. Now, as Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur approach, he has informed me and my wife that he wants to have a jacket to wear for the High Holidays. Wonderful!

Not so simple.

My son is very rough on clothes so my wife and I do not want to spend a lot of money on a jacket. We are not looking for anything cheap but on the other hand, we do not want to go to a store that specializes in suits as you will pay more. If we believed he would keep it nice and get some usage out of it, we would consider this but we know our son and that won’t happen.

My wife has taken the little guy to a few department stores and thus far they do not have anything in his size. It is a little surprising to me, but it is the reality of the situation. Hopefully, we will be able to find a store that has something which will fit, otherwise he maybe going jacket-less again this holiday season.

History Through Music

2007-08-29T20:43:00.001-07:00

As it turns out, one of the days when I am teaching in the computer lab, I will also be subbing for the teacher who is bringing her students to the lab. The teacher who will be working with them about Jewish music will not be able to be there on the day her students are in the lab. The principal of the religious school asked me if I could handle that class. I would just bring them to the lab and go over the material. Normally I do this, but the teacher stays and provides some guidance and works with his or her students as I do not know them as well (if at all) as their regular teacher. Still, I know I can handle this.

The subject is going to be teaching them Jewish history through music. I find this idea to be fascinating. After all, music has played a large part in Judaism. The early idea of most of the Hasidic sects was based on the idea you did not need to know how to pray, you could express yourself through humming and melodies. The Hasidic influence certainly had an impact on Orthodoxy, when it came to music.

The early Israelis working the land, the Holocaust and every period of Judaism all had music associated with it. There are many different types of music and I am curious to see how this session will play out. I am also curious to know how the whole course will play out but I will not be able to witness much of it first hand as I will be busy with other classes in the computer lab. Still, I am looking forward to it.

The Joys Of Moving

2007-08-28T19:08:00.000-07:00

We are busy packing and getting set to move. The movers are coming the weekend of September 7. I personally would have taken more time to get our apartment packed up and got set moving into our house. Our lease for the apartment does not expire until January 31, 2008 so we certainly have time.

My wife looked around the apartment this evening and said she did not see how we were going to be ready to move by next weekend. I agree. It certainly was not my idea.

My wife said, however, she wanted to be in the house by Yontiff, by the time the High Holidays (Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur) roll around. I can understand that. It will be exhausting but it will be great to sit down to the holiday meals in our new home.

The holiday of Rosh Hashanah, the Jewish New Year, is said to set the tone for the entire year. I guess it would be a great time to be in our new home, to start the year off correctly.

I still do not know that we will have everything out of our apartment by then. I doubt we will have the house set up. I do think it can be livable by then and we can have the major stuff out of our apartment (I hope). We do not need to have everything out of our apartment by the holidays. We do, however, need to have everything accessible for the movers and that will be a task unto itself. Still, we are currently working on it and hopefully, it will all be worthwhile.

Led By The Youth

2007-08-27T20:26:00.000-07:00

I mentioned yesterday that I read Haftorah and chanted two of the aliyot from the Torah. The truth is, I was able to do this, in large part, due to a friend’s 14 year old. As Jewish sources point out, “And they shall be lead by the youth”.

Last year I spent a good portion of the time, approximately one hour a week, tutoring a friend’s daughter for Bat Mitzvah. While I worked with her, I also learned. In fact, she wanted to be able to read the entire sedrah on her own (the go with the triennial cycle) and ultimately she was able, she did just that. Still, I felt since it was a bit ambitious (especially for their shul), she should have someone ready to back her up, just in case. She did not need it (and I am not surprised), but I figured I would back her up.

As a result, I learned what she was reading fairly well. Yes, I was out of practice as this year rolled around, since I had not read any of it since I worked with her, but I started looking it over and a lot came back.

So, I really need to praise my friend and his daughter for helping me learn the Torah reading and the Haftorah reading. It is the drive and determination of the youth, it is their ability and desire, that certainly is one of the most exciting aspects about Judaism.

An Exhausting Day At Shul

2007-08-26T15:38:00.001-07:00

I found this past week at shul absolutely exhausting. As it was my mom’s yahrzeit, I looked to get there early (for me) and wanted to say as many of the memorial kaddishes (prayers for the deceased) as I could. I chanted two of the aliyot from the Torah. At my synagogue, we have members read different portions of the Torah, instead of paying someone to do it.

I read the fourth aliyah which was fairly lengthy (I have done longer, but it is a decent size reading. I also read the seventh aliyah. Under normal circumstances this would be fairly long but at my synagogue, they break this one down into four aliyot (as they do 10 instead of the traditional seven). As a result, it was not that long, but it still took some practice and review.

In addition, I received the Maftir Aliyah and read Haftorah. This is the second shortest Haftorah that exists. Still, I found myself exhausted after doing all of it. I am glad I did it, as I did it in my mother’s memory, but now I am glad it is over. I am still not fully back to myself, but I am close.

It is amazing the sense of obligation and responsibility (and I mean this in a positive way) one can have to parents even after they have died. My parents were very big on doing for people while they are alive so those individuals can appreciate it. I certainly tried to do that (I think I did a pretty good job but am sure I fell short at times). Still, the urge to do, that sense to responsibility still remains. Hopefully it will remain for many years and hopefully I will be able to pass it on to my son, not by what I say, but by what I do.

The Life Is The Blessing!

2007-08-24T07:47:00.001-07:00

Tonight is my mother’s yahrzeit. It hard to believe it has been five years on the Jewish calendar since my mother died. I still find it difficult at times, but obviously have accepted this fact. In talking with psychologists, I have learned it is common for some people to feel emotional and physical pain around the anniversary of the death of a loved one.

Honestly, I think in this sense, Judaism has it right. There are things we do to mark the anniversary. I believe these items help individuals to deal with their lose. I will be at services tonight and tomorrow and will recite the memorial prayer that is said on the anniversary of the death. I will receive an aliyah (being called to the Torah), which is often an honor bestowed upon those who have yahrzeit. Actually, I will be chanting Haftorah. I will also be chanting two of the aliyot from the Torah in honor of my mother’s life. (Most synagogues have seven aliyot and maftir (the repetition of part of the last aliyah and haftorah. At my congregation they actually break the reading into ten).

I will also be following the custom of lighting a yahrzeit candle tonight, the candle that burns for 24 hours (or more) that is lit in the evening on the day the person died (The evening before as a 24 hour period in Judaism goes from sundown to sundown. Unlike most things in Judaism, this candle is lit without saying a blessing.

It never struck me as odd or unusual, I just accepted it. Then, when my mother passed away, after returning from the cemetery, as my father was lighting the candle (When someone passes away, you light a candle that burns for a week), my father explained to those assembled that you do not recite a blessing because the life was the blessing. (My father was always looking to teach others).

I had never thought of that. It never occurred to me. Still, I took a lot of comfort in this. What a great explanation (I do not think it was one of his own). We as Jews, we as human beings, need to remember that the lives of others is a gift, a blessing to us, and we should always appreciate it.

So tonight, as I light the candle, no blessing will be said, but I will take a moment to reflect on the blessing which was my mother’s life.

Cult Busting

2007-08-22T13:43:00.000-07:00

I do not know how many of you saw the response from Confessions from the Sandwich Generation to my post this past Sunday, 8/19. (By the way, do yourself a favor and check out her BLOG about caring for both children and aging parents, it is well worth the visit).

In her response she talks about sponsoring a “Cult Buster” to come to their Hebrew High School. The speaker was a Rabbi but when he was first introduced to the students, he was introduced as a speaker from Jew for Jesus. Only after making his presentation from that side and leaving was the Rabbi introduced, to give the kids a different perspective and they were shocked to see the same speaker come out. This is when they learned he was not really a member of J-F-J.

I think a presentation like this is wonderful and there are a number of things about her response that I like. I like the fact that the students got worked up when the speaker came out (when they thought he was a member of J-F-J). I like the fact that they tried to counter some of his “outrageous and false” claims. I even like the fact that when he came out in his suit and let them know he was a Rabbi and a deprogrammer that the kids felt angry. It is more the indifference and ignorance that scares me and here the students had very strong feelings.

Years ago, when I was in college, the Newman Center had a table set up in the student union, trying to make students more aware of the organization. I have no problem with that. I was involved with Jewish organizations on campus and would sometimes sit at “our” tables. We had interesting dialogue with the students representing Newman Center and even talked about doing a joint program.

One day, however, I noticed on their table some literature that had a Star of David. Thinking it was something promoting inter-religious discussions and respect, I picked it up. It was put out by Jews for Jesus. One of the students at the Newman Center table told me how this was an interesting group as they were a group of Jews that had found the Messiah, had found Jesus. The lack of knowledge and understanding they had for what this group was, frightened me. My dealings with the Newman Center were greatly diminished after this.

I have always tried to teach my son (now nine years old) that we, as Jews, should enjoy our customs and traditions and we should enjoy sharing them with others (Jews and non-Jews) but not look to force them on others or think any less of others who do not follow our customs. We should help others enjoy the fact that we enjoy our traditions. Likewise, we should enjoy other people (Jews and non-Jews) enjoying their customs and traditions. It is fun watch, to be an outsider, but just because we enjoy seeing others perform them, it does not mean it is the right thing for us.

To bring this down to its lowest common denominator, we can go out and look at other people who have put up Christmas lights and decorations. We can enjoy how important these customs are to them. But, these are not our customs and traditions. We should be respectful of them and they should be respectful of us.

Unfortunately, when it comes to cults, they are not respectful of others and we need to be very careful and cautious of them.

A big Thank You to Confessions from the Sandwich Generation for getting me to blog on this topic.

A Birthday Present

2007-08-21T11:17:00.001-07:00

I mentioned in a recent post how my wife and I closed on our house (a week ago). Today I celebrate my birthday. I think how my parents always tried there best to treat us fairly. As we children got older, instead of gifts, Mom and Dad would write us a check. They were always careful that each of us would get the same amount.

When each of the children got married, the spouses would get a check as well, also for the same amount. They were very careful to make sure that in-laws were treated the same as children. I was always amazed (in a positive sense) as to the way they treated extended family, including children in-law, always careful not to show any favoritism. Most other families I know make some kind of distinction between a child and that child’s spouse.

After Mom died (and Mom was the one who handled the money), Dad was thrilled to be able to carry on the tradition. Sometimes he would tell me he was going to try but he was not sure if he would be able to do it as he was concerned about his living expenses. I tried letting him know that as far as I was concerned he needed to take care of himself and his needs first. It was important to him, however, to do whatever he could to keep Mom’s minhag (tradition) alive, and even after Mom passed away, Dad always managed to be able to write a check. The Birthday checks kept coming.

Obviously, after both Mom and Dad passed away, the birthday checks (from them) stopped. Having now sold their house (which was their wish) and settled up on most of the funds between the three children (no disagreement or hard feelings, just a few additional things with their account need to be settled before we split the rest of the money, my wife and I took our portion of the money and bought a house (exactly, I know, what my parents would have wanted us to do).

The money from the house, from the estate, in effect, served as this years Birthday check. Therefore, it is important for me to take this time, this moment, and say “Thank you” to my parents for this year’s birthday gift, the house my wife and I have bought for our family.

“Mom and Dad, Thank You!”

Like Ephraim And Maneseh

2007-08-19T19:11:00.000-07:00

This past Friday Night, as I have done for almost nine years now, I blessed my son with the Parental blessing at the Shabbat table. “May G-d make you like Ephraim and Manaseh. May the Lord bless you and keep you… “. It always means a lot to me to be able to do this but this particular Shabbos, it meant more.

My son was born early on a Friday morning. The sedrah that was being read that week in shul was Shoftim. That means that the first time I had the opportunity to bless him was that Friday evening when we were reading Shoftim the next day. This past Friday, when I had the occasion to bless my son, it was the night before the reading of Shoftim. It was the anniversary of the first time I could perform this task.

Considering my son was born six weeks early and spent the first week of his life in the neonatal unit of the hospital because he was premature, the anniversary of this Shabbat is just a reminder of how far he has come. It also serves as a reminder of how much my wife and I have taught him, as well as the failures we have experienced as parents (as all parents do experience them) and a reminder of the lesson yet to come that we will have to teach him.

As I said, it is always special to have the opportunity to bless my son and it is one I always enjoy but this past Shabbos it was just a little more special and a little more enjoyable.

Kindness To Animals

2007-08-17T14:11:00.001-07:00

In Judaism, there is a concept of being kind to animals. It is an interesting concept that even goes as far as saying you do not eat yourself until after you have fed your animals. This is a very humane concept and I find it quite beautiful and uplifting. It is not just the issue of feeding them but overall of being humane. Judaism does not prohibit the eating of animals (as long as it is a kosher animal) and proper procedures have been followed. Those procedures are designed to treat the animal as humanely as possible. Other rules also apply.

Having recently moved into a house, I (as many people will tell you), begin to hear every sound in the house. It turns out that one of those sounds was animals in the chimney. I made some calls and am in the process of having professionals take care of the raccoons that are currently in there.

One of the things that was important to me was that they treat the animals humanely. If they animals are caught, I want them set free. If the animals do not need to be killed, I do not want them to be. Of course, I do want them out of the chimney, for my family’s protection as well as the protection of the house. If the animals become vicious and the only way to remove them is to kill them for the safety of the professionals who are doing it, I understand (and so does Judaism). But, as a home owner, I actually now have the chance to practice being kind to animals and I hope for their safe removal.

Shalom Bayit

2007-08-15T20:25:00.001-07:00

I was fortunate to grow up in a family that understood the meaning and importance of Shalom Bayit. I saw all of my family members make sacrifices to keep peace in the house, to do their best to avoid aggravating other members. It is important to have peace in the house. It is where we go to relax. It is where we live and reside, work and play, relax and reflect. The house means so much, especially when it becomes a home.

The concept of Shalom Bayit now takes on additional significance for me. I am now, for the first time in my life, a home owner. It will take a lot of time and effort and energy to move stuff from our over cramped apartment into our house, but I plan on smiling the whole time.

Of course, the purchase of a house is slightly bitter sweet. I would have loved to have been able to show off the house to my parents, the ones who taught me so much, who led by example, when it came to Shalom Bayit. Unfortunately, they have both passed away (Mom about five years ago and Dad not quite two years) and, obviously, I will not be able to do that.

I have heard the sentiment that my parents are able to see the house and now of my joy. (My Dad would have even been one to say that). I understand that, appreciate it and even, to an extent, agree with it, but it is still not the same.

Still, I am thrilled to be moving in and to hopefully teach to my son the importance of Shalom Bayit with the same value it was taught to me.

Lesson Plams

2007-08-13T10:10:00.000-07:00

It is time to start working on my computer lesson plans. The truth is I am behind schedule as the religious school where I am teaching wants three lesson plans in advance. This certainly is fair and I had hoped to have it done by now, but I will shortly.

I have been in touch with the teachers who are bringing their students into the computer lab and have a game plan as to how I want to proceed. As I have mentioned previously, one thing I enjoy about working in the computer lab is how it is always something different, yet still the same.

The first session I will be working with the youngest students and the teachers will be covering the fall holidays with the concentration on Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur. I know there is a lot of material on the web related to the holidays and some things which are age appropriated.

The second session will be a fourth grade Hebrew class. This teacher is creative in that when she brings the class to the lab, rather than just working with the textbook on-line (which does exist), she likes to work with websites that teach the vocabulary for the upcoming holidays. Again, I will look to find some games related to the holidays that teach vocabulary.

The third session is a new class that is being offered and will focus on Jewish Music. I know there are a number of websites that play many different types of Jewish music, as well as ones that give a little of the history of them. Something else which is interesting is how the web radio, where you can enter different kinds of music, includes Jewish Music (and news).

I definitely have some ideas as to what I want to do. I am excited about putting the lessons together and look forward to working with the students and teachers.

Compromise And No Compromise

2007-08-12T20:44:00.001-07:00

This past weekend we did the walk-through of the house we hope to buy. We ran into a couple of issues. Most noticeably there was a problem with the furnace. The owner paid for an inspection of the furnace and the warranty. The problem was the inspection turned up a problem with the furnace and the owners did not feel they should have to put any money into fixing it, if it is beyond the amount of money the warranty covers.

We felt, as did our agent, that this is a pre-existing problem and they should take care of the whole thing. In the end, we agreed to split any cost beyond the warranty. While neither side got exactly what they wanted, in the end the art of compromise won out.

Just like buying a house, there are times, when it comes to religion, that the art of comprise is important and keeps everyone happy. There are other times, just like when you are buying a house, that there is no room for compromise, it has to be your way, or there is no deal.

There are a number of things where I let my son call the shots. Some of them even revolve around religion. For instance, if he occasionally tells me he needs a week off from shul, he can make that decision. Still, there are other decisions involving Judaism, where he has learned, there is no compromise, things have to be done our way.

Most of the time this does not become a major issue. Hopefully as he gets older, it still will not become a major problem. Who ever said parenting was easy.

Tzedakah

2007-08-11T18:32:00.000-07:00

I recently read an article in the newspaper about a restaurant owner who is putting on a fund raiser to help a woman who has been diagnosed with cancer. The woman needed to move away from the area for treatment and that meant being away from her four-year-old and six-year old children. The restaurant owner is sponsoring a raffle to help raise money for spinal cancer research, as well as help be able to send her children to spend time with her. Check out the website at www.HarmonysHope.org ..

As it turns out, this women was at this restaurant fairly frequently and was always looking to find a way to help other people in need and see if she could get local businesses to contribute to the cause. According to the article, the owner saw her come in and noticed she was not her usual self, so he asked her what was wrong. He decided to help out.

As I was reading this, I thought about the different levels of tzedakah, charity, the exist in Judaism. The lowest level is when the donor knows who got the donation and the person who got the donation knows who gave it. This leads to a feeling of having to pay it back.

In the news story, I do not know if the people this woman tried to help know about it. Obviously, it was not completely anonymous, because the restaurant owner knew how she had helped others. Still, it reminded me of the movie, and the book, Pay It Forward. This is about a teacher who gives his class an assignment to help three people. The idea that when doing a favor for someone, you do not expect someone to pay you back, but you want them to pay it forward, to help someone else in need when possible.

This strikes me as very much a Jewish Concept. I think, especially as we head towards the High Holidays, we need to remember the importance of helping others and hope and believe that by us helping others, the people helped will help yet other individuals in need.

We are taught that when someone saves a life, it is as if saving the entire world. To take that a step further, as many of us may not be in a position to save a life, when helping a person, it is as if you are helping the entire world.

A Supplement, Not A Substitue

2007-08-10T06:46:00.001-07:00

Well, it looks like I will not be able to get to shul tomorrow. Most of the time I am there and it really seems to help me get through the upcoming week. Saturday, however, I need to meet with someone at my home. Most of the time I can avoid a Saturday meeting, but not tomorrow.

I have been to minyan, to services, a few times this week and that does help fill the void, but for me, it is not the same. Why is it that the longest service of the week is the one that also gets the largest crowd? That has been a question that has interested me for quite some time.

Still, I will be preparing for the aliyot I will be laining in a couple of weeks, as well as the Haftorah. Hopefully practicing that, as well as looking over the weekly Torah portion will also help give me my weekly “fix” of shul.

Truth is, in this era of the internet, I can also hop on line and do a Google search (and the search engine of your choice) and find some words of Torah to take the place of a sermon. This will make a difference, but in a real sense, I am glad it does not fill the void. If it did, then this would become just another reason to become more and more removed from being directly involved.

I actually do think that is one of the challenges we have to face today. We need to make sure, with so much out there (at our fingertips) and available to us, we need to make sure people do not step away, or try to remove themselves from being directly involved with the community. This has to be used as a supplement, not a substitute to the way we currently practice out religion.